Mailboy (Wattys 2015 Winner)

12. Hugs, Chocolate and Fun.

She approached the bottle from me and gave me a devious look. I nodded and turned to get the precious napkin.

Squirt.

“Ouuuuuuh,” said the guys, as well as every other customer in the diner.

When I turned, hoping that my assumptions were incorrect, I saw a very un attractive messy spray of chocolate sauce on my butt, my tush, my rear-end—whatever that was called.

Hoo-freaking-ray.

More importantly, it looked like my butthole couldn’t control itself and it had a poop party that got out of hand; or in this case, out of my pants.

“Zoey whatever-your-middle-name-is Hunter. What the actual fuck did you do?”

“Middle name’s Willow.” She shrugged innocently. “Make you look like you shit your pants, duh .”

Shove that duh up your—

“Why? Are you mad, Nico?” She batted her eyelashes.

My eye caught a full maple syrup bottle. “If I could sit on your face so you’d be covered in butt chocolate, I would.”

“Don’t, please! I beg you!” She cried out, her eyes as wide as Dobby’s.

I grabbed the bottle and sprayed it on her face and her shirt. She screamed and answered back by squeezing the chocolate sauce bottle all over me. We both closed our eyes until both of the bottles were empty.

When our weapons weren’t loaded anymore, I opened my eyes. She looked like someone who fell into a bucket of honey. I probably looked like the sky pooped on my body.

Everyone around us was staring, some with horror and others with big smiles. The second group was mainly based off James and Joel, who seemed to be enjoying this the most.

I couldn’t help but laugh. It felt like the biggest weight being lift off me, I hadn’t laughed like this in forever. I laughed so hard I had to hold on the counter so that I wouldn’t laugh.

Zoey joined along as well, clutching her stomach. A few whale laughs came out, as well as a snort. I was too happy to comment on it. I wasn’t happy; I was relieved.

“Wanna make a maple syrup chocolate mix?” She said, opening her arms.

Oh, what the heck?

I hugged her for two seconds before letting go, because I couldn’t stop laughing. Now, we were both sticky and messy. Looking at James and Joel, they suddenly looked horrified.

Zoey stuck herself against Joel first, messing him up. He was whining and groaning because apparently this was ruining his favorite shirt. James, on the contrary, greeted Zoey with the biggest hug. He held onto her and started shimmying against her to get the biggest amount of gooeyness. In a different circumstance, this would have looked very wrong because he would have been rubbing his body on hers.

“ZOEY, WHAT THE HELL?!” cried out a big voice that was enough to make me tremble.

She stopped smiling and looked at a huge bald man with a goatee. His cheeks were so red I thought his blood might start popping out of his veins.

“Uncle Bob, I’m sorry.”

He shook his head disapprovingly at her. “You should have invited me! You know how much I love maple syrup and chocolate together!”

“Bob is the cool uncle to everyone,” whispered Joel to me. “He’s not related to her. He hugs everyone.”

“Want a huuuuug?” suggested  Zoey, her face brightening.