Not The Bad Guy

Chapter One

Virgil Couldn't understand what he had done wrong to deserve this, all he had done was accidentally drop a plate on the floor causing it to break, and yes he knew that someone could have got hurt but that didn't mean he deserved to be yelled at by Roman and Logan while Patton cleaned up the glass and just let them.

He was having a hard time keeping his face from showing what he was really feeling, he kept it as blank as he could and since he has had to keep their face blank plenty of times before he got quite good at it.

He didn't want to show them what he was feeling right now since he was almost positive that Roman would make fun of or mock him for what he was feeling right now.

He stayed there getting yelled at for almost five minutes and they weren't even talking about the plate anymore now they were just yelling about everything they didn't like about him.

It was getting harder and harder to just stand there and do nothing but listen to them finally admit what they really felt about him all the while keeping his mask up so as not to show them what their words were causing But then he heard Roman.

"You don't even care about Thomas! He would be better off without a stupid disorder like you dragging him down all the time!"

Virgil immediately started walking to his room after that was said. He could feel the panic attack coming on and didn't want to be around the other sides when it happened. It was taking all of his willpower to both hold his panic back until he was safely in his room, keep walking and keeping his face blank throughout all of this.

"Where are you going?" Shit! That was Logan he had to answer him or else he would follow Virgil to his room and Virgil didn't want to run the chance of him hearing him having a panic attack.

" I'm going to my room I can tell when I'm not welcome." Virgil was a little surprised at how steady his voice came out considering he was on the verge of an Attack at the moment.

He kept walking when he heard Roman give a snort from behind him obviously not believing him when he said he knew when he wasn't wanted. Virgil didn't really blame him, He kept Thomas up for all hours of the night when he wasn't wanted, well, to be honest, he was never wanted he was the fucking manifestation of Anxiety itself.

The others didn't know this but he took on most of Thomas's anxiety for himself along with the other's as well as his own. So he was basically always on the brink of a panic attack all the time. One wrong move could set him off and he had been lucky so far that he hadn't had one in front of the sides or Thomas yet.

He knew it was only a matter of time until that he did wind up having one in front of them letting them know about the attacks. He knew that when they found out about the attacks they would hate him even more for having such an obvious weakness but until then he would deal with them on his own and take comfort in the thought that they didn't know.

Walking into his room he only had enough time to close and lock the door before he couldn't hold it back any longer. Falling to his knees he crawled to the corner and pulled his knees up to his chest wrapping his arms around them.

His heart was racing and his chest hurt from him having a hard time breathing. His hands were numb and he started sweating up a storm. His room was spinning and his vision was fading and going black around the corners. The room was going in and out of view.

Virgil was terrified, he could tell that this was going to be a long and bad one. He just hoped that the others wouldn't hear him if he started sobbing like he has done before in the past.

A small part of him wished that they would hear him and that hearing that he was sobbing and in distress came to check up on him but the bigger part of him knew that to just be a childish dream as even if they did ever hear him when he was in attack mode they wouldn't care, they never cared about him before so why would they care now.

Virgil thought before the lack of air caused them to pass out, his sight going black eyes closing and body relaxing and his breath evening out since his body was no longer panicking.

So what did you all think of the story so far I know that this chapter is short but I wanted to leave it off where I did for the start of the next chapter but tell me what you think, please? I looked up the symptoms of panic attacks even though I have had many myself cause it's always hard for me to remember what had happened whenever I have one.