Was It Worthwhile?

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°•.CAπSON°•.

Groan.

I seriously wish there was a way to transmit the truth into her stubborn head. Telepathically? coincidentally? Through hipnosis? I'm up for whichever way the job would get done.

Remincing every thing that she's ever said is the worst thing I could be doing right now.

However, knowing that she thinks so little of me, that I'm below 'rotting jar-of-Nutella-with-the-liquid-coming out-of-it' on the list of things she absolutely hates is so excruciatingly unnerving that I just can't help myself.

It isn't my fault that she had to listen to that scum bag and hang off of his every word like he was some god.

Like come on, I'm a much better choice and I'm not being biased at all. It's a fact. Right?

Why can't she see and get it through that thick head of hers what she means to me? This girl is going to be the death of me and I can't seem to escape from the abyss that I've fallen into.

It's absolutely settling to know that she's going to be there to catch me once I've come to the bottom of this bottomless pit of hopelessness. Yahhhh... totally.

" ' Yah totally' what?"

Oops. "I.. uh...", I began stuttering. I regained my posture "You know what!? Just shut your trap, you talk wayyyy to much".

" Bro. You've been trying to burn a hole through that wall with your non existent Matilda-influenced skills", he smirks.

Lil b*TCH. I start to roll up my sleeves, "Wanna go?" I put my chest out for a fraction of a second before retreating it back.

He just laughs and continues to text whoever it is that he's been hitting up lately.

His little distraction wasn't enough of a decoy because here I am imagining things again.

I find myself thinking about waking up to her every morning to kiss her awake, picturing her unruly tangled mess-which she likes to call 'a work in progress'- beautifully caressing the frame if her face. Hoping that one day those dreams will turn into reality. So that I can finally ensure a pursuit of happiness in my life.

"Dude, you're only hurting yourself. If you want her so bad why don't you do something about it?" Jose

"Can't you see? I have been trying to do something about it for a while now, without success. She hates me!! Like the  'I want to dislocate your body and then throw you in water tank full of sea orchins' hates me." I breathe out after the rant.

"What's with you and orchins dude? They haven't done anything to you." He says giving me a look that says 'are you for real'.

"Psssh. They shouldn't exist!!!" I all but shout out.

"Stop diverting from the topic. Just buy her some flowers and chocolate. Baam. You got your girl"

" She's not that simple..." I trail.

(Ufbdoenryw flashback djemeorb)