Still Here [Fillie]

The Jump

⚠️WARNING⚠️ suicide attempt
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Finn's POV

"So why weren't you at school yesterday?" Gaten asks as my friends and I sat outside on the grass during lunch. They all ate as I just sat there daydreaming of Millie. She's supposed to tell me if she's ready to be my girlfriend or not today. I'm just so scared of her response. What if she doesn't really like me? I shrug at all my friends with a frown. "I just didn't feel like coming. I was just so tired yesterday." I explain as I struggle to even sit up in front of everybody.

The redhead who was laying in the grass with her head on her boyfriend's knee flashed a smile up at me while playing with Caleb's fingers. "What did you do yesterday that made you so tired?" She quires. I shut my eyes and shake my head before lying in the grass with a few scattered old leaves around. October is really pretty, too bad I'm too sad to enjoy it. I do like the chilly air gently blowing through my hair. It reminds me of her. I shouldn't think about her, I'll only stress myself out.

"Hey Finn, are you okay? You're not eating and you seem sleepy. Do you wanna go to the nurses office?" Noah interrogates while going to town on a three meat and cheese sub he'd been bragging about how he had made it all morning. I shake my head and take a deep breath before quickly sitting back up and putting on a smile to reassure everyone. "Guys, I'm okay. I know I seem a bit off today, but I just wasn't having a real good day yesterday so I'm still recovering." I announce.

Gaten shook his head before I heard a subtle whisper in my ear. "Millie." The voice was raspy and eerie. I whip my head around and see nobody behind me. I pinch my brows. What just happened? "Did you guys hear something?" I ask the group while I still look around for whoever was doing that. "It's just the wind, calm down." Caleb said as I stood up and searched the field. We were the only ones out here.

"Millie." I heard it again. The voice sounded slow, almost like it was dragging out her name. My ears felt like ice. "I don't think it was the wind that time." I conclude before snapping me head in every direction. "Finn, please calm-" "Do you think it's her? I think she came to tell me." I blurt out. I didn't wanna believe it was her though. She might tell me that she doesn't wanna be with me. She gave me plenty of reason why she didn't want to be in a relationship with me last night.

"No! No! No! No!" The voice grew louder and almost clearer. It was no longer whispering that bone chilling whisper, it was screaming at me. Is her answer no? Is it even Millie? I cover my ears and screw my eyes shut to stop the voice. It didn't work so I took off running. "Finn, what the hell! Come back!" Sadie screams. I don't listen to her, I don't listen to anyone. I just kept running. I don't know where I'm going, but I need to be alone.

Soon the voice stopped and so did I. I was at the quarry trying to catch my breath as I look around. I took a few steps towards the edge of this rocky cliff and look down at the murky blue-ish green water below. I hate that I was alone. Now I'm only trapped with my thoughts. Thoughts of Millie rejecting me. Memories of our kiss from last night. I hadn't told anybody, I sincerely felt completely alone and trapped no matter what and where I go or who I'm around.

"Jump." The voice quietly whispers. My breath got caught in my throat as I just stare down at the water and consider the idea. What will happen if I jump? Will I be free? "Jump. Jump. Jump." I took a big deep breath in and out before hesitantly taking two steps closer to the very edge. This is happening. Oh dear god, it's actually happening. Am I seriously going to jump? If I do jump, Millie and I could be together forever. We could kiss and hug and see each other all the time.

I stuck one foot out over the edge. Right before I could even fall forward just a little bit, something grabbed my hand and pulled me away from the cliff, spinning me around. My eyes widened and I felt my heart start beating again when I see Sadie standing there with worry all over her face. "Sadie. I was just-" She cut me off by grabbing my face and smashing her lips onto mine. I was surprised at her actions and tried to pull away, but she kept me close.

The blue eyed girl releases me and looks into my eyes. I was absolutely speechless once I saw tears in her eyes. I blinked a couple times and finally spoke. "Why-...why would you do that?" She shook her head and started huffing. I could see her getting angrier by the second. She slapped me plain across the face and I held my cheek as I look at her in such confusion. I was absolutely stunned. What has gotten into her? "If you ever...think about doing something like that again I'll kill you myself!" She screams. Her voice echoed through the air and I just stood there looking at the fiery red haired girl.

"Please, don't do that." She was much quieter this time and her voice cracked as tears were now pouring out of her eyes. I slowly nodded with my lips still parted and she brought me into a hug. I hear her sob onto my shoulder as I just held her close to me. "I just don't know how to make you stay." She cries as her arms nearly squeeze my waist. I rub small soothing circles on her back and just let her do what she needs to do. I'm still perplexed about what had just happened.