If Only I Stayed

PROLOGUEEEE 

"Megan, I want you to come with me.." Harry begged, water filling his eyes as his hand held onto mine tightly.  

"Harry, you know I cant. I'm pursuing my dream and what I want to do. I can't go on tour with you and be your little secret." I slipped my hands out of his grasp and headed toward the bedroom.   I did my last minute packing and zipped up the two big luggages sitting on the end of my bed. The pictures of Harry and I still sat on the night stand next to my bed. I sat closer, taking the pictures in my hand, tears started rolling down my cheeks. Was I really going to walk away from my 'relationship' with Harry? He meant the world to me and just thinking of losing him broke my heart. I placed the pictures in my drawer, shutting it and leaving it behind. I needed to focus on me now and what I wanted to do to set my future. Ever since Steve Johnson signed me and set me up with Syco music company, my life has been sky rocketing, but there was always something bad once every good thing happens. Harry.  

Harry stood next to the counter, head in his hands. I can hear tiny sniffs coming from the kitchen. I knew he was upset, so was I. I loved him, but I was too afraid to admit to him, and even myself. I dragged my luggage out the bedroom and shut the door behind me. Harry immediently stood up and started towards me. I locked my arms around his neck and rest my head on his chest. His heart beat was fast as his cologne filled my nose.  

"Please..." his eyes were red from all the crying. I had no choice. My plane was in an hour and it was either I get a record deal, or I stay with Harry and be his little secret for who knows how long.   I lifted my head to face him now. He slowly pressed his lips onto mine, my fingers were now tangled in the back of his curls. Our lips moved in sync as he pushed my back toward the wall. Our breaths were soft and fast. His arms strapped again my waist, holding me close. I was closer to him than ever, yet I still felt so far away. I needed more. His arms carried me to the couch and gently placed my head on the cushion. His eyes were a shade of dark green and full of sadness. I knew this was a bad idea. I couldn't lead him on before I leave him like this. But it felt so right in all the wrong ways. His legs were on both sides of my hips, out lips crashed against each other several times before I let his tongue in. Our bodies were were so close, moving up and down, feeling my stomach and bottom area tighten. His hands reached the zipper of my pants and quickly unzipped it when my phone started to ring.  

Buzz Buzz. Buzz Buzz. My eyes fluttered open as I quickly got up and grabbed it. It was a text message from Steve Johnson.  

New Message:      

        Your plane is in 45 minutes. Come to the airport now!  

I sighed and turned back to Harry. He was was sitting on the couch, not bothering to fix his messy curls. I zipped up my pants and grabbed my coat.   "I have to go.." my eyes starting to burn seeing the hurt in his eyes.  

"Please..don't, I love you" this time he really meant it. He really loved me and I loved him, but it was too late.    

"I'm sorry." I said turning away before he could see the tears stream down my face. I turned the door knob and dragged my feet, rolling the luggages behind me. I turned to look at Harry one last time, before closing the door and shutting him out of my life.