Hey babies... I'm depressed as fuck rn and I can't show my parents or anyone soooo here you go!
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I stared in the mirror practicing my fake smile. It's hard to admit your broken to people that don't care about you anyway. "BENJAMAN" Of corse my dad had to yell my name right in the middle of a session of fake smiling. I ran down stairs to see my dad with a few bottles a beer behind him. "Y-yes sir..?" I was nervous of what he would do to me. "Come here now" he spoke with venom spitting our with every word. "Yes S-sir." I walked slowly up to him facing him. He pulled off his belt bringing it in contact with my white skin. I bit my lip trying not to scream or even whimper, 'cause if I did that meant punishment. As he hit me numerous times I started to cry running away to my room. I took out my 'diary' even though it's a journal not a diary! My father always taunted me for having one. It's where I wright all my small problems in. Example me being gay. I mean so what.. I'm human... right...? I shook off the feeling that everyone I know are homophonic. So 'happy'. I ran down stairs ignoring my father going out the door to the bus. As I arrived at school I went through 2 classes before Brandon Hyler threw my journal into my locker. "Aw does that diary look familiar? Heh it should because it's yours Benjie." "DONT FUCKING CALL ME THAT!" "I'll tell the whole school about your secrets. Unless you do this one thing for 1 month. For me only." "What is it Brandon..?" "We have a little fuck session after the first two periods." "Whatever just do t tell anyone..." "I won't. Also bathroom now." I did as he said. It also lasted for 3 months instead of 1. "Really Benjie? Your not doing anything I'm telling you to do.. that means punishment." I wasn't scared. I wasn't gonna fight back. The fear of my secrets leaking through the school would kill me. He took my glasses off and threw them on the counter of the bathroom. He pulled off me belt pulling my pants down. All I felt was.. pain... i heard the door open. I quickly pulled up my pants as a shooting pain ran through my hips down to my legs. "What the fuck are you doing to him Brandon?" "A punishment." I reached for my glasses and put them off looking at the person that saved me from that.. that.. raper.. it was Austin Duster. My dream boy actually.. "Get the fuck away from Benjaman or I'll beat the fuck out of you." As Brandon walked well, ran out the bathroom Austin helped me up. "Hey, Benjaman. I'm sorry about my cousin..." "it's okay I guess. Just he will start leaking the secret out to the school" "What secret?" "I-im gay...". "So am I!" "R-really??" "Yep." "Cool" he got closer to my face softly brushing his lips against mine. OMG DREAM BOI KISSED ME!!!! I kissed back softly. Who would have thought this was the person that would mend my life back together..?
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Yeah sorryyy but yeah. I'm depressed and I just don't know what to do besides talk to my bf.
My sexuality is pan btw!!😉
