I don't belong to you

Chapter 13

I looked at my phone. I should just text him, I thought. It worried me knowing he was going to bars and getting in fights. I sighed and hit send.

Are you ok?-S

After waiting a half hour my heart started to race. What if he did something stupid? Something more stupid than a bar fight. I quickly started dialing numbers.

"Hanna?" I asked, hearing her pick up.

"Yeah?" She sounded tired.

"Could you do me a favor?" I asked.

"Depends," she said honestly.

"Would you mind watching Hayden for a few hours? She's already sleeping, you just have to stay here with her." I bit my nails getting more nervous thinking about him.

"I guess," she said sarcastically.

"Thank you so much," I sighed.

"Yeah, I'll be there soon," she mumbled into the phone.

I knocked on his door patiently waiting for him to answer. After a couple minutes I started getting impatient. I opened the front door walking right into his house. All the lights were off. I could hear the TV on in the living room. I found him sitting on the couch, eyes glued to the screen with a bottle of straight liquor in his hand.

"Toby," I sighed.

He looked at me for a half a second and then turned his attention back to the TV. He pulled the bottle up to his lips taking a long sip. The taste didn't even phase him. Most people would cough or at least make a weird face.

I pulled the bottle from his hand. "Did you drink all of this today?"

"Yeah, ssso," he slurred.

"This is so dangerous," I scolded him. "Have you heard of alcohol poisoning?"

"I've gotten really good at thisss," he glared at me.

"Look at you!" I yelled at him. "You are a mess!"

He chose to look away from me like he was ignoring everything I had to say. I sat down next to him. "Toby you have to stop this."

He looked pale, his lips looked white. His one eye was swollen and so was half of his lip. "Why'd you get into a fight?"

"I don't remember," he shrugged. His head was laying back against the couch. He looked at me. His eyes were unable to focus he was so drunk. I could smell the booze on his breath.

"Toby you need some help," I said seriously.

"Help me," he blinked, liquid forming in his eyes.

"I can't help you," I shook my head.

"You're the only one who can help me," the tears escaped his eyes.

"I can't," I shook my head harder. "Let's get you to bed," I stood up. I reached for his hands trying to help him up. I should've known better. He was too drunk to hold himself up. Instead he pulled me back down on top of him.

I pulled myself back up and quickly ran up to his room and grabbed some sweatpants and a t-shirt.

I started unbuttoning his shirt. I could feel the alcohol that missed his mouth and landed on his shirt. He was such a mess. I slid him out of his shirt and took off his undershirt. I Put on a clean and dry t-shirt, and then started unbuttoning his jeans. He surprisingly didn't fight me or say anything at all as I undressed him. After I finally got him all dressed for bed I laid him down and covered him up.

I grabbed his empty bottle and threw it in the trash. I went through the rest of his cabinets and emptied all his alcoholic beverages in the sink before throwing them away.

"Spencer," I felt a pair of hands on my waist making me jump.

I turned around in his arms startled. "Why aren't you laying down?" I scolded him.

"I miss you," his eyes started to well up.

"I know," I whispered. "I have to go home now."

"Please don't," he still held on to me. He pressed his forehead against mine.

"Toby, I can't do this," I tried pushing him away.

He pressed his lips to mine. The taste of the alcohol was even stronger than the smell. I missed this. I missed him. I wanted nothing more than to give in and keep kissing him. "Please don't leave me..." he said into my mouth. "Not again." I could here the pain in his voice. I knew he was referring to my accident.

"I won't be gone like before," I reminded him.

"But you won't be here," he looked into my eyes.

"Let's get you to bed," I pulled him by the hand. I got him into bed and pulled the covers over him.

"Just stay the night," he pleaded.

"Toby," I shook my head.

"Please. I can't sleep without hearing you breath," He held onto my hand.

I sighed pulling out my phone and texting Hanna. "Just tonight," I warned him. "But this doesn't mean anything. We aren't going to cuddle, we aren't going to kiss, and we are definitely not going to have sex. I'm only staying because you are such a mess right now."

He nodded his head and scooted over for me.

After laying there for an hour I tried falling asleep, but my brain couldn't turn off. I turned my head to the other side. His eyes were still open looking at me. Without hesitation he pulled me into his side and wrapped his arms around me. I should've said no, but I didn't. I couldn't.