(Jungkook POV)
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"So whenever you get time, please give me a call back." I spoke into the phone, recording a voicemail as his phone went unanswered for the nth time. "Thanks."
The snow melted outside, the rain penetrating the insides of their mountains, laying itself beneath the ice uninvited. But I lay on my bed, glued to my phone. I wanted to call him again, to record what I really wanted to say because I miss you, so come back, please do.
I dialled his phone again, wanting to say it. It went to voicemail.
"I'll see you soon, I have to. We're not over. Okay?" I closed my eyes, but then quickly opened them again, because closing my eyes would prevent me from seeing how beautiful the world looked when I said, "I love you, okay?"
"And I-" I didn't know what to say, but I knew what I was feeling, and he was the one that was always good with words and hidden meanings and plot twists, so I said, "you know what I mean. You always do."
I hang up, and it was recorded, saved in his mailbox.
It was perhaps the eighth voicemail I'd recorded within the past week. The walls were beginning to close in on me.
No, they definitely were, and the sound of rain slowly began to tune out, slowly, slowly, as my chest heaved a little heavier.
I sat upright immediately, reminding myself of what I read online a few days, to stay in a relaxed position if you feel the panic coming.
I was sitting properly, I was, but my breath came faster and I frantically looked around, knowing I was going into a frenzy of panic.
"Don't panic," I called out, looking around, not sure what I was looking for.
But this felt different, wasn't like the usual panic attack that set me in a puddle of numb arms and aching chest, like being full and empty at the same time and I wanted to leak out from each pore this damn anxiety.
No, this wasn't panic, a frightening realisation set on me as my knees began to shake, that my heart wasn't beating quick because of anxiety, but of something else.
This wasn't a stroke, was it, though? No, a heart attac--
I screamed, "Mum! Help me! I-I can't breathe!"
Footsteps rushed up the stairs quickly, like the same thuds in my chest. She ran into the room and I lost my balance against the door, banging into the wall.
I gasped, eyes rolling into the back of my head, I was breathing through a straw, a truck on my chest, someone jumping on my chest and head and stomach, knife at the back of skull for my head was exploding.
I want to speak.
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