The Forgotten Son

What Once Was

"Try to reason about love, and you will lose your reason."
-Anton Chekhov-

Some people say that family is a pillar of strength, a group of people who will stick with you through thick and thin and will never judge or abandon you no matter who you are, what you are and how you are.

That is what the majority would say. However, the small number of people would say otherwise. They said family is neither a pillar of strength nor someone who will stick with you. They will judge you at every turn possible. Eventually, they will leave you when you become something they don't want you to be. So, the question is which one is it?

Harry Potter, in his short, young life, would once say that the majority was right. He had a loving and caring father. But now, he wouldn't say the same anymore.

Harry James Potter, the son of the late Lily Potter and James Potter, who died in a mass shooting by the notorious criminal Thomas Riddle (who calls himself Lord Voldemort by some reason) was left an orphan by the age of one. He was then adopted by his mother's closest friend,  Severus Snape. He has been living with Severus for thirteen years. Their father and son relationship is really close that many would envy. Severus is a renowned Chemist for his researches and works as a Chemistry Professor at Hartfield High School. Harry himself has enrolled in the same school, which he attends under a Sports Scholarship.

Harry's really good at playing football, which Severus finds to have no use in life. Harry just shrugged. He likes playing football, and he's good at it, so why not?

Harry really enjoys being with his adoptive Dad, although he was sorry to have not shared Severus' love for Chemistry.

Harry really wished he was good at it so that Severus wouldn't hate him just as much.

He really wished it with his whole being, especially in times like this.

"Harry James!" Harry gulped when he heard his father's sharp voice from the kitchen. He knew why Snape sounded so upset. Their cards were just released that afternoon, and Harry knew that his was already in Severus' hands.

He knew he flunked Chemistry.

Why does those damned ionic bonds and whatnot make no sense to him?

"Harry James!" There was his father's shout again. Harry felt tears threatening to come out of his eyes, but gulped it down. His father's ire would not be soothed by tears. His father's disappointment in him won't be easily placated either. Tears won't solve anything, Harry knows just as much.

Harry presented himself, still in the state of nervousness and anxiety. He wished he could tell his father just how he felt.

But Harry did not miss the look of utter anger in Severus' face, so he decided to shut up.

He needs not know the reason why.

"Harry James, how could you have a grade like this?! Your teacher said that you have to repeat Chemistry this year!"

Harry did not look up. He could feel the disappointment in himself that it makes him want to just bang himself to the nearest wall.

"You are grounded, young man! No football, no computer, no phone, for two weeks! You need to at least reflect on why you managed to fail when I myself taught you. What would they say about my parenting if I am not able to make you at least pass the subject that I am good at?!" Harry did not say a thing. Why bother? Snape wouldn't listen to him anyway, "Well? What do you have to say for yourself?!"

Harry bit his lips until they bled, then sucked the coppery, salty liquid to attempt to down his demons.

"What? Nothing? You think you can get away by being silent?" his father scoffed. Harry's heart tore itself apart. He wondered if Snape could hear it. "Why can't you just be like Draco, Harry James?! Ah!" Severus threw Harry's card, walked out of the kitchen, then proceeded to go inside the room where his protegee and godson, Draco Malfoy, was silently watching the whole scene in total silence, eyes fixed on Harry. The door shut, and Harry was left standing there, eyes fixed to where Snape was standing minutes earlier.

That was when Harry let down his tears, sobbing until he could not feel his face anymore. He quietly picked up his discarded card and cradled it to his chest.

Inside the adjacent room, Harry could faintly make out his father's laughter, coupled with Malfoy's.

Harry felt his breath hitch.

It hurts. It hurts as though he could feel his body being tortured, flogged over and over, again and again. It was like tiny, little bees were stinging him to the bone. His mouth went slack and his tongue could still map out the scars from where he bit himself a few moments ago.

If this was what having family would make Harry feel, he doesn't want it.

----

"Damn, Harry! You are amazing, mate!" Ronald Weasely exclaimed as he caught a glance of Harry's card.

Harry smiled wanly. If only his father had thought the same.

"I'm sure your father's really proud of you, Harry," Hermione quipped from her sandwich and gave him a small smile.

"Yeah," Harry answered half-heartedly. He hid his face in the back of his juice cup.

His Dad didn't want to see his A+'s in the rest of his subjects; he could only see the tiny D in Chemistry.

He didn't fail; it was not just the grade Snape expects from him.

"Hey, Harry, why is Draco with your Dad?"

With Ron's question, Harry raised his head, and regretted it the moment he did. There they were, shoulders shaking at some random joke that Draco must have told his Dad, looking like how they were before. It was not hard to feel defeated. Draco was now Snape's little boy. Harry just ceased to exist from his father's eyes the moment Draco Malfoy perfected their Chemistry exam, and was made his father's research assistant.

Harry was, after all, just thrusted into Snape's life without preamble. Draco was Snape's choice.

Damn it. His heart hurts.

"He's Dad's assistant," Harry answered, willing his voice to sound nonchalant about it.

Inside, Harry was anything but that.

Inside, Harry was dying, while his father sees nothing but a disappointment, stabbing him over and over.

In a distance, a certain blonde was eyeing Harry silently, concerned, looking at the smaller boy intently; he was seeing beyond Harry's smiles, seeing the breaking boy, reading him like an open book.

Draco then looked at his Uncle Severus and wondered, what happened to them? Draco was always envious of their relationship- not that his father didn't love him. It is just that they aren't as close as Harry and Severus 'was'. Was it his fault that their father and son bond is no longer the same? Did he ruin it? The raven haired boy may think that he doesn't notice it but he could see the absolute loathsome look the boy would give him.

Draco knew inwardly Harry blamed him for their dysfunctional family. His heart broke at the sight of the helpless boy yesterday who took in Severus sharp and harsh words. The tears streaming down his face was ignored by the elder man as he continue to degrade his son. In Draco's paradigm, everyone is excellent at something. Does Severus even know that besides football, Harry is extremely talented in Literature and History? Harry  would always score the highest mark in History. Literature teachers would use Harry's pieces as an example for the students to read and learn.

The blondie had seen the boy in the Library reading books such as classic books by William Shakespeare and Jules Verne. Harry was a downright great student, making it to the Honour List without much effort.

He knew it is only matter of time until Severus loses Harry. Before Harry becomes a shell. When will the old man realize that Harry is more than meet its eye? He had tried telling the man to spend time with his son. His Harry. All the man would do is ignore the fact he has a son. Draco can't bear the day when Severus realize what he has lost and Harry is too lost to be saved.