Cooking with Mr. Gadget

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INT. KITCHEN STUDIO SET - DAY

A small messy kitchen with various bowls and supplies is seen. One item is a medicine mortar bowl and pestle. The theme song starts to play as MR. GADGET, a mid-30s man wearing a purple vest and white shirt, enters from stage left.

MR. GADGET
Welcome web watchers to another episode of Cooking with Mr. Gadget.

The show's logo splashes across the screen as a recorded audience claps.

MR. GADGET
I'm your host, Mr. Gadget. Today's episode is a special one. For a while now fans have been asking me how do I make the Wake Up Juice. In fact, there's one now.

Sounds of crickets chirping is heard.

MR. GADGET
I said, there's one now...(pauses) Danny!

INT. KITCHEN SET AUDIENCE SEATING - CONTINUOUS

DANNY, a mid-30s man, sits among a group of empty chairs playing a game on his phone. He finally looks up.

DANNY
Oh. Right. (clears throat) (recites line unenthusiastically) Mr. Gadget, how do you make the Wake Up Juice?

INT. KITCHEN SET - CONTINUOUS

A mildly annoyed Mr. Gadget is caught on camera.

MR. GADGET
(smiles, realizing the camera is on him)
Glad you asked random fan. The Wake Up Juice, a staple of FurryLand, is created through a specialized formula mixing various ingredients. Many difficult to obtain. Luckily, the previous owner had a whole greenhouse full of the stuff growing in order to better imprison his unfortunate victims. So after I defeated him in an epic end boss battle and freed the locals, I took over the greenhouse as well.

Mr. Gadget begins grabbing seemingly random ingredients.

MR. GADGET
Kids, don't try this at home. Wake Up Juice is specially made here following the patented Anatomy Reinforcement Formula, or ARF.

An offscreen voice begins the disclaimer, including side-effects from misusing the Wake Up Juice and the legal rights of the company. After the disclaimer is finished, Mr. Gadget continues.

MR. GADGET
(adds each item into the mortar bowl as he names them)
First, you take your medicine mortar bowl. Next, you add some B12, C, E, Omega-3, and other essential vitamins. Then, you add a dash of antioxidants and electrolyte boosters. Now, add a sprinkling of protein and sugar. Throw in some vegetables and fruits. Finally, add some dairy. And don't forget to add a bit of water and twist of lemon...because, why not.

Mr. Gadget sets the mortar bowl aside for a moment. He ducks behind the counter and returns wearing a hazmat helmet and gloves and carrying a metal tong with a vial of something.

MR. GADGET
Now we carefully add our spice. Just a couple drops will do.

Mr. Gadget adds a drop of the liquid to the mortar bowl. A small mushroom cloud forms over the bowl with a foom. Mr. Gadget removes the hazmat helmet, sets the tongs aside, and removes the gloves.

MR. GADGET
Now for the final ingredient. The dragon's blood flower. You only want to use a small amount because of its toxicity. (adds a flower petal to the bowl then takes a breath) Now for the fun part. (grabs the mortar's pestle) Crushing the mixture into a fine paste!

Rock music blares as Mr. Gadget wildly grinds the ingredients using the pestle. He laughs maniacally. Mr. Gadget suddenly stops, as does the music.

MR. GADGET
You must laugh maniacally. It's part of the formula. It has something to with harmonics and sound waves interacting with the mixture. Now you know why mad scientists laugh while conducting their experiments. Oh! And you have to have the rock music playing while mixing for the same reason.

Mr. Gadget resumes smashing the ingredients as the music starts up again. When he and the music finally stop, the ingredients are a paste.

MR. GADGET
Now that the ingredients are a paste, you can mold it into pills, apply it as face paint, or add it to your favorite drink. Depending on the method of delivery, you may need to heat the mixture so that it is more of a powder.

Mr. Gadget heats the mixture over a flame, mixing occasionally, until it dries into a powder. Danny enters from stage right with a pitcher of fruit punch. Mr. Gadget dumps the mixture into the well-known punch and stirs. Within seconds, the powder has dissolved. Mr. Gadget takes a long sip.

MR. GADGET
Ah.

The end credit music begins to play.

MR. GADGET
That's it for today's show. Next time, we look into why eye of newt is making a comeback as a garnish. Don't forget to vote and comment. Until the next wormhole...

Danny and Mr. Gadget wave.

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