Even After Forever | ✔

3. I'm Creating My Own Map

We all are humans, but we're all lacking something; humanity. Its hard being human, all these feeling that tear us apart. We all throw ourselves into something to help express our feelings.

Dancers move elegantly, their minds just barely spinning off the edge of the world. Painters, you don't know how sane they are, how crazy they could be. Their paintings tell a story, soft strokes against harsh ones, a burst of colors for different feelings.

Writers; the words they use, the descriptions they unfold, one could write tragic events while another could write blissful ones. Their words swirl together, a mixture of emotions, creating a story.

Photographers; they capture everything. Every little detail, down to the bottom. Some cultures believe its a sin to capture someone's soul in a photo, it holding it still for eternity. I believe it captures the beauty of the soul, the aliveness of the person. You can look back and see what you were feeling, all the happiness.

As a photographer, I like to capture my happiness, so when you look through the films and see your face; remember, you're my happiness.

       ~ Dearest, Me

•~•~•~•~•

I scowl while walking down the hallway, people clearing the way for me; obliviously seeing how I'm in no mood for chit chat, then again, when am I ever? Last night I had gotten in an argument with Linda, I told her I was no longer going to pay for her gas since she doesn't pick the kids up. So because of that, I'm sporting a bruise on my left cheek, I'm trying to hide it with my hair.

The only reason I'm alive is because of Britain and Meryl, if it wasn't for them, I'd probably be on my way to hell. I've been told many times to not think that way, but people just don't understand that maybe the reason I am the way I am, is because I'm not qualified to do anything great in life.

Sadness is like a drug; it takes you away from reality, and makes you see it in a whole new way. It makes you see many more flaws in life, you see more details. It makes you a better con artist, lord only knows how many smiles I've faked.

I slip into the English room early and take a seat in the back, pulling at the hem of my plain black t-shirt. My camera of course hangs from around my neck. My eyes flick up to the door Chance just walked through, I cant help but stare at him, he looks so off today.

He must have felt my stare since he looks over with knitted eyebrows, "Take a picture, it'll last longer." He snaps childishly, I don't even bat an eyelash at his outburst, it was quite amusing actually.

"What are you doing?" He questions sourly as I pick up the camera from around my neck. I hold it in my hands, tilting it to get a good enough angle. Without warning, I snap a few pictures, a small smile fighting its way to my face.

I let the camera fall against my chest and I look back at Chance, a fire in his eyes, "You're something else Sawyer Queen." He says, his voice light, the scowl now replaced with a grin. Again with him calling me by my whole name, there must be something wrong with him.

"Okay class, get with your partners, we'll be working on the project for today's class." Mrs. Cross states loudly, trying to quiet down the other students. I let out a sigh, I almost  forgotten about the project. I watch as the students seem to shut up and try to do their work.

Chance looks at me, pulling out his notebook, "Whats you're full name?" He asks, a pen already between his fingers to use, I give him a doubtful look. I watch him roll his eyes and hold up the loose piece of paper that goes with the project outline. I squint my eyes, reading the top part of the page, I read the part where it asks for basic information, and our full name is a question.