The red String

The Beginnig

'The water that my feets were standing in was cold. It was normal for the Atlantique. I lookd around me. There was no one execept me at the beach. I started to walk in the water unil my hips where under water. I turned around to look at the beach. There, at the start of the beach, was a shadow. It looked like a person. I wanted to yell but I had no voice. It was killing me not to know who was standing there. I started to run out of the water but it felt like I was going more inside the ocean. And I was right. I was farther away than before. I turned around and saw a big wave coming to me. It hit me and I was under water. I didn't know anymore where up and where down was. Then I heard a loud sound, like an alarm'

I sat straight up in my bed and relized I wasn't at the beach. It was just a dream, but still I felt my throat just to be sure I really wasn't drowning. I turned around to my alarm clock to shut it off. It was an old one, with superheros on them. 

I was lost in my thoughts, when I heard my mothers voice "Crissi! Stand up. If you gonna be late to school on your first day, you are grounded for the whole year!" The divorce with my father turned my mom in a new person. She got mad more often and started to drink, but she still cares for me in some kind of weird way. Of course I didn't took her threat seriously, but I still hurried to get dressed.

I wore my black tanktop with short dungerees. Around my hips I put a red and black coloured flanell shirt. I looked in the mirror to check my hair. I cut it this summer so my hair stops a little bit under my ears.  I took my beanie from the closet and walked down in the kitchen.

On the table was my plate with two toasts and honey on them. Next to it was standing a glass of milk. I sat down and quickly said ,"Thank you, Mom", before I started eating. She smiled and sat down across from me. In her hand was a beer, already half empty. I looked at her and I could see very strong eye bags. If she is having them, I know she was in a bar with her friends last night. Again, I looked at her beer and reminded her, "We had a deal. No drinking while I am here." She looked at me with cold eyes. " Well then hurry and go to school." Being a scum really sucks. I didn't cleaned up my dishes. I never do. My schoolbag was still in my room so I went upstairs and got it.

On my way to school I thought about how cool the holiday was, until I heard a scream I knew just too well. I turned around and saw Sam running to in my direction. " What the heck did you do to you hair? You murded it!", he put his hand on my shoulders and shaked me. Sam was addicted with everything that had to do with hair. Toni and I could already see him working in as hairdresser in future. Sam started to try to "fix" my hair.  I took his hands in my hands so he would stop. "Sam. I told you that I wanted to cut my hair." He looked at me with big eyes, "But...But I thought just to the breast and not that short. You can't even see your hair, so short is it." While holding his hand I turned around and went in the direction of school and I pulled him with me.

On the way to school we mostly talked about how I "killed" my hair. I tried to defend myself, but after a while I gave up. We walked hand in hand to the entrance of our school, where Toni waited for us. When he saw us he stopped us and asked with irony "Pease, tell me you didn't turn him straight". He pointed on our hands and laughed. He got between us put his armes around both of our shoulders. Sam looked at him with a sad look, " I'm sorry, she convicend me. I fell in love wih Crissi. She is the girl of my dreams." After the last sentence I couldn't help me anymore and started laughing. I holt myself on Toni , so I wouldn't fall on the floor. These guys always get me to laugh, it isn't boring with them. My two best friends joined my laughing and after a while my cheeks were hurting from all the laughing. Sam finally go to broke our laughter," Okay, guys, we really need to go to class." I looked at him and hoped we wouldn't go, "What? No, lets go somewhere else. School is boring." They both looked me in the eyes and I could see that they were serious. "Crissi, we know you hate school, but we can't skip the first day of our senior year.", Sam took my hand, "I'm not even sure, why you hate school, it just sucks that we are here to learn." I throw my head back and sighed. Toni made a deal," How about we skip school tommorow? Is that in your mind? " I smiled and nooded.

Together we walked to our homeroom and got our lockers. I had only one class with Toni and one class with Sam.

With Toni I had drama and with Sam I had gym. My other classes were englisch and music. Sadly I had gym first, so I took my gym back and walked through the cafeteria to the gym and then in the changingroom. The room was already full of girls and what they did was what girls do. Gossip, laughing, talking about the summer romances and crushes they had. If you would stay here the whole day, you would know every rumor of the school. I just didn't like it in here. When I started to change, I could feel the eyes laying on my body, full of jelousy or disgusted. The jelous ones were because I am skinny and trained looking, but the disguted ones were beacuse of my character to them and my scars on my arm.

I am not proud of them but even with Sam and Toni I had rough times and I wanted it to stop. It did when my mother finally realized, that my dad had an affair with another woman and broke up with him. At this time I realized how much my dad hurt my family and me, mentally. My dark times are over now, but there are still the scars that are reminding me of them.

I walked in the gym alone and leanded on the bleachers until our gym teacher called us together. We stood in a circle and the techer told us the rules and what we are doing this semster and all that unimportant stuff. After that we started running. At the end of the class I went straight in the changing room and changed. When the bell rang I walked in the cafeteria again, but I stopped at the vending mashine for a water. With the water in my hand I went to my locker and I put my bag in it and took my binder for the next class. Just because I hate and skip school I can still be good at it. As I closed my locker a few girls walked by and I started to walk behind them. One of them asked the girl with long blond hair ,"So you just moved here? I'm sorry, but what was your name again?" At first I didn't really listened but then when I heard the answer my eyes widened in shock. "It's no problem. My name is Jessica Longstern. I know it's a weird name." I stopped walking and dropped my binder by accident. All I thought was 'How is that possible? Of all people. Why her? Why now? The girls in front of me turned around and when they recognized me they just said, "Don't care about her. She is weird." Luckily for me, they just started walking again and I could take my binder again. I looked at the clock and realized I was late for my class. Still in shock I ran to my drama class and opened the door.

"I'm sorry, that I am lat...", I sopped , when I saw her in the room. Toni saw me and waved to me, but when he relized I didn't react he said," Crissi! Don't just stand there like a weirdo. Come here." I finally reacted and walked over to him and sat down. "Hi." was all I sad to him. He looked at me like he saw me for the first time,"Is everything okay? You are pale and you look like you saw a ghost." "I think I did", was my answer and we stopped talking when the teacher started to talk to us. "Welcome back students. I hope you all had a great summer. As some of you already might have realized, we have a new student here. I would like if all of would come on the stage  and we introduce us all to her. Come on, don't be shy." We slowly stood up and after a few seconds we stood in a circle and she started to introduce herself," Hi everyone, I'm Jessica Longstern and I come North Vancouver. I am 18 years old and we just moved here." I looked at her and I felt like I get a panic attack any moment. After while it Was Tonis turn "Hi, I'm Toni Talcon and my best friend is this beautiful girl, right next to me." Everbody looked at me because it was my turn. "Hi, I'm Crissi and I am 18 years old" I hoped she wouldn't regonize me, when I wouldn't just say my last name, but my teacher ruined it," Crissi, please with last name like everybody else. Again" Why? Why me? But I did like she asked," Hi, I'm Crissi McCarter. Next please." I praied she wouldn't remember, but when Iooked at her I knew she knew who I was and she knew that I knew who she was. Her eyes just layed on me and she didn't pay attation to the others anymore. Toni saw us both looking at each other and pushed his elbow in my side,and whispered"Crissi? Do you know her?" I didn't answer but I looked on the floor and thought 'Yes, I know her. She was my best friend but then she ruined my life and she is the reason why we moved. The girl who told everyone that I have no string.'