My Poems

Poem # 22: As My Consciousness Fades

A long time no see ay? 

This poem was made with the theme 'self inflicted harm'  in health class. Enjoy~ <3<3<3

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As My Consciousness Fades

One by one they left me,

My friends, relatives and family

There was one person though, who I thought stayed

But due to circumstances, he was also swayed

All I did was pray but nothing came

Was I forsaken in life, this risky game?

I was isolated, all I can do was cry

I wanna crawl in a corner, to rot there and die

I tried to find me comfort

By drifting off to sleep,

But escaping my reality was much worse

I was standing atop corpses, in heaps

Struck by the nightmare, I awoke

I wanna vomit, I wanna choke

Why do this happen to me?

Is this what I was fated to be?

I can't stand this anymore,

People think of me as a bore

I thought it's better if I'd not exist

Just when I caught a glimpse of my wrist

I got an idea,

A smile crept on my face

As my hand scuffled to find something,

I needed to find space

I pointed it to where I hear a beating,

I'm so nervous, I can't even sing

As it digs on my own flesh,

Somehow, I feel refreshed

A deep red liquid dripped of the floor

With the luster of rubies, I want to see more

So I repeated the process,

And created a lot more mess

I feel the pleasure, I feel the pain,

But it's not enough to keep me sane

Those dreams that haunted me and those that happened,

I wish that this'll be the end

But I open my eyes, still alive,

I'm doubting myself if I'm still fine

My hand then again scuffled around

To find those tablets I want found

I told myself that to find them is a must

To end my problems from present to past

As I had a handful of those pills

I said, "This'll be my last meal"

I had another round to make sure

That they'll never find a cure

If they find my body around;

As I close my eyes without a sound

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  btw, pic is not mine. just disclaiming  

That's it! Well, actually I do feel sad but I won't go far like the one in my poem.

I lab my laifu~ <3 or I'll never to watch anime or to bake again and I hate it.

Love yours too!!!