Dear younger me

Dear younger self,

I know that you wanted to believe in me, but sometimes you didn't.
Because through all the darkness you were facing, you simply could not see.
But here I am.
I still think back to when you were 6 years old, and absolutely terrified of your first school day.
I know you didn't wanna g, but you did anyway.
You pulled through all of it
~ Bulling
~ Depression
~ Suicidal thoughts
~ Years of isolation
~ Anxiety
~ A simple heartbreak
~ Panic attacks
~ And nobody believing in you

All you ever wanted was to be held, loved, and appreciated.
And I know that you didn't get to feel that way.
You were afraid of the world because what has been done to you.
yet you always kept believing in positivity and embodied the change you wanted to see in the world.
I admire you for that!
You were the victim of so much negativity you would still put yourself in that role even when nobody was harming you in anyway.
You made yourself suffer more than u had to.
I forgive you for that
You thought you had to be the victim for people to care about you
But enough is enough!
You have suffered enough.
You were so kind, so beautiful and maybe you didn't see it but I do now and I'm so sorry I didn't see it earlier.
I'm sorry that I didn't see your magic
I'm so sorry that I wanted run away from you for such a long time.
But I didn't know any better. But I can't run from you though, because you apart of me and you always will be.
So I turned around, opened my armed to you and finally held you like u always needed.
And I know that you needed to hear it from me more than anybody else.
So I'll say it now.
I love you and I'm so proud of you.
I thank you for not giving u because everything happens for a reason and I will not let all those years be for nothing.
I will not let your tears be for nothing. When I was the one who wiped them away. 
I GOT YOU