Now and for the Last Time

44 장

Which, really, would be the name I'd give our relationship, not that I could every say it aloud. We weren't madly in love yet, but I liked him a lot. It wasn't exactly epic, but we had a story. Not totally perfect, but, well, close enough. And I hadn't expected that anyway, from or any other guy, really. You only get so many sunset walks.

As I thought this, Mark leaned forward, surprising me with a quick kiss. I jumped, startled: I was still adjusting this style, a kind of dive-bomb affection that was cute, really. At the moment, I was aware of Kyungsoo, behind the counter, who'd been shooting me looks ever since we'd arrived. Mark had ordered for us, sparing me direct contact, for which I had been grateful. As he headed for the bathroom, though, Kyungsoo made a beeline for me.

"I have to admit," he said, in a dramatic way that made me suspect he'd planned what he was going to say ahead of time, "I'm surprised."

I looked around the busy shop; other customers, pastry display, Phone Lady now talking about her difficultities with her mother. "About what?"

he nodded toward the men's room. "You're here with someone who isn't Sehun. Kind of weird, considering he dumped my best friend for you."

"What?" I said. "No, he didn't."

"No, he didn't," he repeated in a high voice, mocking me. What a jerk, I thought. "Funny, because that's exactly what he told Tzuyu. Here she was, busy planning a wedding for her cousin and best friend, and you guys run off and hook up at the 1000 won store behind her back. Nice."

"I didn't hook up with anyone at the 1000 won store," I said, as a man at the next table looked over at me. When I glared at him, he quickly turned back around. "And if Sehun brought me into their relationship, that's all him. I had nothing to do with it."

This was true. Sure, I'd thought for a second I had some feelings for Sehun, but I'd been caught up in the moment, the wedding, not to mention spending basically my time with him for the entire summer. Just as quickly, though, on the dance floor, I'd realized my mistake, come to my senses, and gotten out of here. If Mark and I had our origin story, this was the opposite, bit it served the same purpose. The more I told it, the more I believed it.

"Everything okay?" Mark asked, returning to the table and putting his hands on the back of my chair.

"Yeah," I said, looking at Kyungsoo. "We were just catching up."

"I got to get back to work," he said, as if I'd been the one tearing him away from his job. "See you around, Suzy."

I nodded, and then, thankfully, he was leaving, going back behind the counter. "Nice guy," Mark observed. "I like the hair."

I smiled, turning to look up at him. "Don't get any ideas."

In response, he leaned down, kissing the top of my head. Another sneak attack, but this time I didn't react. I had a flash of how we must looked from the outside, a happy couple having breakfast and some mild PDA at the beginning of a late summer day. I wasn't sure what I meant that I did this often when it came to Mark and me steeping outside of myself to consider us from a distance, like an observer rather than participant in the relationship. Because you know you're going through the motions, a dark, quiet voice replied, the one I heard sometimes late at night when I couldn't sleep. To be honest, this was the same time  I found myself missing Sehun - his breaking of office supplies, melty croissants, and, maybe, kindness - in a way I couldn't explain. In daylight, though, it was easy to silence: I pushed out my chair, standing up, and it was gone.

"So you're off at six?" I asked Mark as we headed for the door, passing Phone Lady, who was still talking loudly, a biscuit in her mouth.

He pushed open the door, holding it for me. "yeah. Then I've got some top-secret birthday stuff to do. But I'll see you around eight."