It is always like this i give you all of my attention
But you give me a speck of yours,
I try to be the best for you
But is my best not good enough?
I try to be perfect for you,
But every time i try my imperfections comes back 2x stronger,
I try to give you everything you want
But every millionth thing i do for you is a single "thank you"
I have tried to hold back every tear when you hit me
Because I didn't want you to think i'm a drama queen,
I let you hit me because that is the only time
You get to touch me,
I know its weird but i like you and i can't help it!
I was always there when you needed a friend...
But where where you when i needed the same thing...
I am tired!
I am tired of being tied down by love!
I hate being like this!
But you made me like this!
I can't help it!
I can't help seeing you with that other chick
I can't help crying my self to sleep thinking that i will never have you!
But i still can't stop loving you!
What is wrong with me?!
Am i broken?..
Can i be fixed?...
Because i'm sick of my heart pounding like a drum
whenever you enter the same room as me...
It hurts you know...
To see you with the people who don't deserve you!
You have been brain washed and drugged mentally!
And you know it, but still you don't stop!
I went crazy you know...
And to see you laughing after i killed my self,
You didn't care that i died...
In fact after my death you made out with yet another chick..
I felt so dumb..
I just realized....
i wasted my life,
on a human being who did not deserve to have me always there for him!
I regretted this moment over thinking my decisions...
Often asking the questions...
WHY did i choose to die?!
because a single human that i liked acted like i was invisible...
WHY did i think so stupidly?!
I made my parents cry..
And my siblings cry...
My best friend cry...
I left them.. without a note...
Without a sign of killing my self...
But they are still there... praying...
That i get to heaven safely..
Damn! i forgot about them..
But theres no turning back now...
I've already made my decision...
I already acted out..
There is no going back..
Now I'm just here...
In the darkness..
Waiting to pass the test to go UP or DOWN..
Just here.. lonely... no friends... no one to talk to.....ALONE...
DEAD...
(If you ever thought of killing your self for someone who didn't like you for who you are,Think about those people
who worked hard to make you live an extra day -Aie)
