Honestly, I Don't Really Know

A Letter for Alexandra

It's been 19 months. I still miss you. That will never change Alex, no matter how many years pass. I know you miss me too. I'll be with you again some day.

You know, you're the first person I ever loved. I pretended not to and I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I treated you like that. You don't deserve that kind of treatment, you deserve better. You deserve the world.

Now I am with the second person I ever loved and although I am not always happy, I'm glad to be with him. I still miss you though, you are by far the best friend I've ever had. I have one now, a best friend. I think so anyways, I'm not always sure. She's nice but she isn't like you. Nobody is.

I designed my tattoo for you, I think it's perfect. You would love it. I never want to forget you, and who you are. I never want to lose that part of me. I'm not sure if I could bare it. I remember your smile, but your sadness is what is burned into my brain.

I'm so sorry for that day, I'm so sorry for how I treated you and the things I said. I'm sorry that I got scared and reacted badly. I'm so sorry Alex. I'm sorry I never got to tell you how much I loved you. How much I love you.

And I know we made up, but its not quite the same is it? I never told you how I truly felt. I was too late. And now you're gone forever.

Anyways Alex, I miss you. I love you. You were the best person I ever knew and I know you continue to be now.

Love,
~Skye