Across the ocean, rolling waves spread before me, reflecting a sky with painted deep reds, pinks and yellows blurred together like watercolour. Small pebbles stretched across on either side of me, snow dotting the tiny crevices dividing each pebble, preventing them from properly touching each other, I knew the feeling well. Ripples danced around my boot covered feet as I turned to the forest behind me. I paused a moment, watching the ripples clash and fight in a losing battle with the incoming waves, each circle eventually succumbing to the overwhelming tide pulling them in to throw them back at the weather-beaten beach. Ripples fought again but I didn't watch this time, instead leaving the war of the water behind me, and trudging my way across slippery rocks, watching as the rocks began to fade behind me blending into the muddy, dirty snow-littered ground. The trees began to thicken and the snow dusting the forest only covered the large trees uppermost branches. I stood a moment and closed my eyes, listening carefully, hearing every light thump of branch releasing the built-up snow, and the wind racing through the trees. My partner Leo always tells me that when all you could hear was your heart beat, you had become one with the forest, and you would feel like you could do anything.
We first met in the local village, I was new, sparkly and exciting, and he was the weird forest boy no-one spoke to, except for me. Upon hearing the rumours about him and his forest lifestyle away from other people, I became curious about him. I wanted to know more, talk to him, find out why he lived separately away from everyone else. So, we spoke, he would visit the village once a month and would always talk to me, even after everyone else became bored of me, because I wasn't new and exciting anymore. He took me on walks in the forest and taught me how to notice the small things, like how to relax and sit and listen to the leaves rustling when the wind whistled through them, and how beautiful they were when they turned orange and red, beauty I only ever appreciated in paintings, but never through my own eyes. I would look at him and take in his eyes, turquoise crystals that would stare at me, seeing deep within me, eyes that were always focused on my own. Whilst watching his scruffy platinum blonde hair flow like a spider's web in a light breeze I would feel the warmth of his hand, each groove of his palm against my own like puzzle pieces fitting together after years apart. We spent so much time together over the coming years, leading to me eventually moving away from my family, and giving up the life I had always known for him. My time spent with him was always wonderful and I learnt so much from him. I even fell in love with him.
I heard crunching in the snow to my side, and I felt myself drift back to the present. Turning, I spied platinum blond hair peeking out slightly from behind a bush, and wandered over to it, giggling a little once I reached it. His hair was scruffier than usual, tiny leaves were tangled in the thin strands, the green standing out against the lightness of his hair and the light coverage of the disturbed snow around him. He stood, towering over me as usual, his old, deep brown coat and pants allowing him to blend in well with the thick trees around him, and his pale skin appearing to glow in the dim light of the forest. A smile lit up his face as he turned and headed towards our small cabin, me following close behind him, stepping in the foot prints he left in the dirty snow. We weaved in and out of the trees, following a path known by heart until our cabin came into view. The dark tree trunk walls stood firm against the harsh weather, holding out even the most insistent of bitter, biting winds making it a haven for whomever was using it as a shield. Snow had fallen heavier here, crystals made of water bounced light in all directions, throwing glistening patterns across the snow guarded ground. Feeling cheeky, I bundled up some snow, shaping it into a ball, the frozen sphere stinging my fingers and palms, and threw it at the distracted Leo. Sadly, my aim was bad and I missed him, hearing the cold ball hit the ground, he looked at me, laughing at my poor aim and diving at me. I giggled too, dodging him, and ran inside the cabin where we stayed for the rest of the night.
As usual, my sleep was filled with nightmares, and I woke up feeling as though I had never slept. What they were about was something that I could never remember upon awakening. I stood, moving quietly past the sleeping Leo to the door, grabbing my coat and heading out into the frigid air. I walked through the dim forest, my foot prints separating the mottled snowy ground, listening to the animal's exchange routines. The bats and owls preparing for the day, and the birds rising early for the worms. Their chattering building as sunrise neared. Reaching the pebbled shores of the ocean, I pulled my coat tighter around me, the wind biting my uncovered skin forcing me to pull my arms in close. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him emerge from the forest, my Leo. He gracefully walked towards me standing silently by my side, a slight smile lifting the features of his face. We resumed our soundless journey, comfortable in each other presence. Walking across the stony beach until we reached a corner of the cliffs that would forever remain untouched by the ocean, the turning tides never able to reach close enough to cover the pile of rocks at the base. The source of all my nightmares. I knelt, jagged edges of the rocks ripping through my pants, piercing my knees. Tears blurring my gaze as I stared ahead, my broken heart aching and the pieces of my soul falling lower.
"It's time to let me go."
Hearing his deep voice, I pivoted in place, staring up at the eyes I held so dear to my heart. I nodded, and the sun rose. Light shone through Leo's body, blinding me for a moment before I was able to look at him. I stood, reaching for him as he did for me, my arms going around him as his lips crashed with mine. Within seconds, he was gone. I stood alone on the beach, my arms wrapped around myself facing the sunrise, as my shadow covered the grave of the man I loved who had fallen ill, and died, five years ago.
I was now alone, watching the sunrise, as the world moved on without me.
