whisper of silent

Define me

Did you know that I am been starting to lose myself? In those year when something happens but you can't express your feeling in a word.

Somehow that things make it worse. Days by days I did not realise that I become a different person that people might be hating right now.

I cannot talk everything that is hidden in my heart. It really hurt when I excited to tell something but people don't.

Every breakdown make me become a monster version of myself.

I have big family and friends but they never been here. I tried different ways of convince myself by music but sometimes people didn't respect my comfort zone.

Little did you know I am ready when people leaving me. I am already to live alone. There is no point on living with people that keep on hurting you without realizing.

To them, a simple apologize can make everything go back to normal. But did you know your words hurting me a lot.

I don't like how I am right now. I become a person without any feeling. What make me crazy is when I can let go people that I care because I want to be alone.

In past, I really think my birthday was a special day that I can be better person and start a whole new life. but right now, I give up my special day. I give up on living. I just need to survive alone. I keep on trying to be helpful person but why I feel like they did not appreciate me? I don't have any depression or anxiety. I just change my thinking. That's all.

I did not have any high expectation anymore. You want to leave? Go ahead! I don't mind. I learn that people did not always stay with you. At the end, you just need your own support to be better.