Back To Where I've Never Been

Part 3

Violet

I wake up in time for lunch. A different nurse brings me a plain meal of applesauce and a small sandwich but I don't mind since I go back to sleep soon after I eat. When I wake up the third time, I'm a lot more clear-headed than I have been all day. The pain meds seem to be working, all I feel is a bit of a pull where the bandages are on my side but it doesn't hurt. I feel well enough and aware enough to realize I have a problem. I press the call button, which brings Nurse Andrews back to my room minutes later.

"Yes?" she asks.

"I, uhh..." My cheeks start to heat, I've known Nurse Andrews for a while now, she helped my mom with everything from bathing to bedpans but I can't seem to get the words out. Thankfully, she understands. With a grimace that I suspect is her version of a sunny smile, she come to my side.

"You should be well enough to head to the bathroom yourself, it's through the door over there," She points to the only other door in the room, on the other end of the room.

"You ate lunch?" She asks, checking my chart. Before I can answer, she nods. She must have read the afternoon nurses notes because she comes around to un-hook my IV.

"You won't need this anymore, I'll go start your discharge paperwork while you go. You'll feel sluggish but you can clean up and put on your clothes if you want. I had them washed for you."

As soon as Nurse Andrews is out of the room, I allow myself a quiet moment of silent tears, the salty smell tickling my nose as they run over my lips and down my chin. It had been a long time since anyone had done something so simple as washing my clothes. Mom was sick for a while, and then she was in the hospital. Even before that, I was more of the adult in our house. My mother was a good parent, but she wasn't exactly equipped to be a great adult. She had been through a lot in her life, not the least of which was having a baby at fifteen while in the system. I think it left her in a sort of permanent childhood when she got out, she liked things to be simple and carefree. She couldn't be bothered with things like laundry or bills so by the time I was able; those things fell to me. I didn't mind, like I said, she was a good mom. But the gesture by Nurse Andres still touched me in a place I had thought healed over by now.

I sigh as I shuffle towards the bathroom, my stiff muscles aching. I wonder if I'll ever really heal, probably not. There was really no going to back to the girl I was before mom died. Not sure I even really wanted to.

*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~

After I get my business done and cleaned up as best as I can in the hospital bathroom, thankful for the toothbrush and comb someone, probably Nurse Andrews, had left there with my clean clothes. I exit to see Dr. Haven sitting casually on my empty bed, looking like he'd been waiting for me. I can't decide whether to be indignant he was sitting so casually on my bed, weirded out by his over-casual manner or flattered by his attention. In the end I end up a combination of all three, sputtering out a choked

"wh-what are you doing here?" If Collin notices my anger, he doesn't show it. Instead he sends me one of those disarmingly charming smiles before getting up, bouncing a little as he walks over to me.

"Leaving?" He asks, ignoring my question

"Yeah." I mutter, not sure what to make of him. He's weird. That's for sure, and way too friendly with patients.

"Well, good luck Violet Price. I wanted to stop by and apologize for my earlier behavior. I was just...worried." He doesn't say the end of that sentence about you, but I can catch the meaning and decide to just accept Dr. Haven's attention for what it is, pity. I have had enough of it since mom died to recognize the signs.