The First Lost Girl

Chapter 1

Stars. Stars start everything in Peter's mind. The moment he last closed his eyes all the way back to the first time he opened them, there were stars.

He could see them in his dreams when he went to sleep, he could see them in his mind when he was awake during the day in every little thing. He could see them in his girlfriend's eyes. He could see the adventure within those stars, the little sparkle of trouble within Hailee's life.

But Hailee couldn't possibly handle that adventure. She'd already lost Peter once, she couldn't understand why she was in love with the boy without time. It'd been a year and a half since she had seen Peter die. The fact he was still standing and alive today was almost unbearable to Hailee.

Tinkerbell had given her life to save Peter, Hailee was forever grateful for that. But how could she live, knowing that she was the one who killed Peter in the first place?

Hailee sat on her bed, staring at the wall. It was the morning after another night of terrible nightmares, all ridded with loosing Peter. She felt numb, like most mornings, though she never did tell Peter about her dreams. Instead, she stared at the blue flowers painted on her purple walls, seeing vines and petals mix together in a pool of color.

Her bedroom was smaller than the one in Bloomington Illinois, but it was her favorite one all the same. Indianapolis was her family's main home, one of many. Her father, being as rich as he was, owned homes across the country, and selling custom sneakers online brought enough cash for Hailee to retire on if she wanted to at any moment.

The smaller room somehow made her feel safer, like a safe space for her to let herself relax. The past year and a half had been poisoned by nightmares of Peter's death, and the hands by which he was killed. She remembered the feeling of the knife in her hands, and the wet, red blood that had ran through her fingers. She shuttered.

"Hey, Hailee..."

Hailee turned to see Peter leaning in the doorway, looking to her. She bit her lip as she saw him smile at her, and underneath his chin she spotted a long, dark scar running across his neck. She knew what that was from.

"...get dressed, we're going to breakfast." He said, tapping the sides of the doors, before he disappeared behind it with a grin on his face.

How could he be so comfortable going around in public with that scar? How was he comfortable with any of it? The memories of what happened, the fact that he died? Hailee looked away from the door, biting her lip harder.

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Hailee seemed distant now, especially when around other people, it occurred to Peter. She acted like something was wrong, like something was between the two of them now. Peter couldn't explain it, the distance she had put between them in the past year and a half. But he had a hint of why it was happening.

Peter had only told Hailee of his past a year and a half ago, and that was when Hailee became more distant. He understood how she was probably feeling, but he didn't understand why it bothered her so much. He was still alive because of her and Tink. Every day he had to go out into the world with the scar across his neck to prove he was still breathing, to prove that he was still alive for Hailee's sake. But what bothered Hailee didn't bother Peter at all, and in fact, he was proud of the scars. He was proud that he was finally free of past burdens, and that he could be with Hailee without any desire to stay distant to keep her safe.

But what was right in Peter's mind, Hailee felt as though it was her fault for Peter's death. And it was. She was the one who let the hook scrape around his throat, she was the one who plunged the knife into his stomach. And she couldn't live with that.