Deceiving the Duke of Kerrington

Chapter Twenty-six

As I waited for her to deliver the afterbirth, I was shocked to see that she was actually birthing another child! She was so weak that she barely realized what was going on. I had always wanted a child of my own, having had the chance to witness the miracle of birth hundreds of times. I longed with all of my heart to get to experience the love of a child for myself someday. Circumstances being what they were, I was getting along in years and knew that I would most likely never have the opportunity to marry and have children of my own.

In that moment a temptation came over me like none I have ever known before or since. I was alone in the room with a despondent LadyBrattondale, while her maid had gone to inform the earl of the birth of his daughter. I knew that nobody would ever have to know about this second child and that, if I was careful, I could claim it as my own.

Please do not hate me for my admission and for the horrible deed I did in taking you. It was a moment of great selfishness as my emotions warred within myself. I knew it could be the only chance I would ever have to be a mother and my heart longed for that as it had longed for nothing before or since. I continued to do battle with myself, not sure what the outcome would be, but as I watched LadyBrattondale slowly deteriorate and eventually slip away into death, my decision was made; I would not leave you to be raised motherless, no, I would raise you as my own.

It wasn't hard to hide you, you were a weak and sickly littlething who barely made a peep. I wrapped you in a blanket and hid youin the armoire while I continued to see to my duties. Thehousehold was in an uproar over the unexpected loss of itsmistress, so when it was time for me to go, I was able to quickly andquietly sneak you out hidden amongst my basket of linens andsupplies.

Though I have regretted my deceit and know I have sinned greatly in taking what was not mine to take, I have never regretted having the opportunity to be your mother. You are a real lady, Hope, and though circumstances were meager, I tried to raise you as such—requiring you to learn to read and write and learn all the proper etiquette befitting a true lady.

When the opportunity arose for you to become a lady's maid for your sister, Lady Noelle, I was fearful but I knew I could not refuse. It was the closest you would ever be to the life you were born to live. My only hope was to be able to disguise you so they would not see the truth.

I hope that you do not hate me for my admission of wrongdoing. I hope that somewhere you can find in your heart to forgive me and to know that, despite my horrendous actions, my intents were pure. I wanted so badly for you to have the love of a mother, and I knew I could offer that to you, but you my dear child, offered me far more in return. You are the pride and joy of my heart and the love of my life.

One last thing, the ruby pendant belonged to your mother, your real mother. She was wearing it the night she gave birth to you and Noelle, and when she died, I removed it from around her throat and placed it next to you in my basket. I wanted so badly for you to have something of your real mother. She was an angel who sacrificed her life to give you yours. In light of stealing her child, I figured stealing her necklace was the lesser sin.

Love,

Your mother

Hope'stears were flowing freely now. She was horrified to realize her whole life had been a lie. She wondered now how she could havefoolishly accepted the fact that she and Noelle were almost identicalin appearance without become suspicious of the resemblance. And why didn't Noelle find that abnormally odd as well?

She wanted so badly to be angry at her mother, no not her mother but Matilde, but she couldn't find a place in her heart for anger past the hurt and confusion she felt. She agreed full-heartedly that it had been a grave sin for Matilde to steal a child from its home and rightful place in society, but she couldn't say that she regretted her choice to do so. Because of her, she was raised by a woman, though not her mother by blood, but a mother in the truest sense of the word. Matilde had shown her unconditional love and acceptance and taught her that the character of a person was far superior to any title or wealth. Without her intervention, Hope would have been raised a Parrish, a spoiled daughter of the Earl of Brattondale.