Ashton pulled his lips away from mine and began to kiss down my body, his lips sponging over my chest and my stomach. He left small kisses all over my body, muttering random things under his breath as he kissed all over me. I brought my hands to his hair again, guiding him down farther as his continued to leave short kisses on my skin.
"Ash," I whispered, hoping that he wasn't going to cut me off again, like he had done so many times before.
"Yeah?" Ashton asked, his lips pressing a small kiss right above the hem of my underwear again. I could feel him smiling against my skin, probably at the fact that I had called him Ash again.
"You have a condom, right?" I asked, suddenly remembering something very important. I didn't really want to kill the mood by bringing it up, but I think that worse thing could happen if I didn't ask for a condom. I wasn't interested in getting pregnant and I don't think Ashton was interested in being a father either, so we better be safe than sorry.
"Fuck, yeah, I do." Ashton said, quickly getting up. He walked to the foot of my bed where his pants had landed and searched through the pockets, while I took a second to breathe and actually process what was going on.
I'm suddenly really glad that I didn't give in and have sex with Michael earlier tonight, because as I'm realizing now, it wouldn't have been as special. I care about Michael a lot, but I didn't love him the way I loved Ashton, and everything would be so different if I had lost my virginity to him. I wanted my first time to be with someone that I was in love with, and that was Ashton. I couldn't imagine doing this with anyone else.
Ashton returned a second later, with the condom on, I'm assuming, and got on top of me like he had been before. His fingers hooked themselves under the hem of my underwear and finally pulled them down, leaving small kisses on my legs as he did so.
"You're gorgeous, have I ever told you that?" Ashton smirked, holding himself over me again.
"I'm not sure that you have." I smirked back, my fingers tangling themselves in his hair. I was growing more impatient by the second, I just wanted this to happen already.
"Shit, Dani, are you nervous?" Ashton asked suddenly, which caught me off guard. I really hoped that Ashton wasn't going to change his mind now, when we had already gotten this far.
"Maybe a little." I answered slowly, feeling Ashton's hands squeeze at my sides.
"It might hurt, baby. You're sure about this?" Ashton asked one final time, and nodded. I understood why he was asking now. It wasn't for himself, but more to make sure that I was the one comfortable with this. Clearly Ashton was alright with having sex, or else he would have stopped by now he just wanted to make sure that I was okay.
"I'm sure, Ash, I really want this. I really - " Ashton silenced me with another kiss, and I'm not sure if he knew what I was going to say or not, but it didn't really matter to me anymore.
"Are you ready?" He whispered, pulling away just slightly and resting his forehead against mine.
"Yes." I put my hands on Ashton's shoulders and he leaned down one more time, kissing me once more before this whole thing started.
Ashton spread my legs apart even more, giving him some more room as he lined himself up with my entrance. I felt an uneasy feeling come to my stomach as Ashton thrust into me for the first time and I bit down on my lip, trying hard to ignore the slight pain that I felt.
"Are you okay? Does it feel okay?" Ashton asked, kissing my lips again. I nodded, letting him know that it was alright to keep going, despite how uncomfortable I felt at the moment. "You're so - you're so beautiful."
