It didn't start right away. It started creeping its way to my heart and soul. It was steady, but I ignored it like it wasn't a big deal. That was a mistake, because sometimes I was happy and sometimes I was so sad I cried in silence alone didn't let anyone know.
After two months of this I realised that I was wearing a mask in school in home and around everybody. Then I started to think my relationships with my friends and how they avoided speaking to me . My thoughts went to my parents and how they acted when I was around and started to think they don't love me,but only love my siblings. I was starting to grow tired of trying to make them proud of me. And the constant disappointment in their eyes was breaking my heart piece by piece.
it doesn't stop after taking a walk. It doesn't stop after trying to get over it. It just grows and grows until it's big and cold as the ocean, only darker and emptier.
People say that they care still they forget. Their words of comfort and compassion echo empty, like a scream in outer space. I hear them, but how can I believe what they say when all of it is just empty promises and words said out of it being the correct thing to do instead of being done from actual care.
