Chaos Is What Killed the Dinosaurs, Darling

prologue/chapter one

"So, Kurt, you and me tonight?" Ram whispered into his ear, ignoring the looks on the Heathers, followed by Veronica and her new 'boyfriend' Jason Dean. Kurt nodded, acting like everything was going to be okay.

"Hmm." JD said, eying the boys. "What, bitch?" Ram said annoyed, still not having trust for the feisty man. "You don't have room to talk, fa-" Veronica elbowed him, with a glare that could make anyone feel uncomfortable. "Bunny boo- Veronica, come on, he deserves it." JD stood up fast, it was like watching a grass hopper, a tall, obnoxious, shocking, crazy, rude grass hopper.

                                                              Kurt's P.O.V

Ram froze. It's like whenever someone even mentions him being even the slightest bit different from everyone else, he just freezes up. Even though it's just Ronnie and her current "lover boy" as she calls it. It just bugs me. Sometimes it's cute how awkward he can be in situations like this, he always scoots closer to me and holds onto my hand until we're out of the situation. He finds me—somehow—okay? I don't know what Ram sees in me, it's like he doesn't even notice all the problems I have. He doesn't even notice that I'm fucking mesmerized by him. He just—he's so different from what everyone says he is. He's a lovely person. I've known him for along time, and sure he's changed, but he's better. It feels like I'm the only one who can see that, though.

Ram is kind of like a history book to me, I understand him like he understands football. I understand him like he's Math. I mean–it's not like I can say the same for him though, he sucks. He's kind of like the only person I know who can't figure out why math even fucking exists. He says, "let me put it to you his way, Kurt. Only Spanish speakers can easily learn Spanish. And only smart people can learn it." Over time, I've absolutely fucking fallen in love with everything Ram says and believes. It's like, he just can't fit within it all. That's how I perceive it

You know, sometimes I feel like people see me as dumb, but I actually haven't failed a single test this year. Because in all honesty, if I fail this year then Dad might choke me out. He might even kill me. Oh and, because I don't want to seem like the idiot that everyone kind of just says I am. So, suck on that Westernberg. I hate to admit it, but a lot lately, I've been letting my inner "oh god Ram is going to think you're dumb, speed up! Don't let him know you're going to fail, he won't want you! He'll leave you to die, do this to be with him"... thing, you see, it's something that I'm always thinking about. All my horrible insecurities, especially the ones about my smarts, or about Ram.

How Ram thinks of me.

You know, I also don't really think of myself as a "Jock", not like he does. He thinks of himself as the "Jock that's TOTALLY gay" and you know, I never thought about these kinds of things around him until earlier this year. When he said this, "Look at JD"

Ram and I are going to go home in a little bit to watch a few movies, since our dads—my dad and his—are out on a fishing trip for the weekend. Ram said he wanted to watch, something like Friday the 13th, and for a split second I thought it was because of Halloween. Now, I just think it's because of my sort of weird obsession with Jason. I like to rewatch his movies, not because of anything weird but—I just think his mysterious ways are better then let's say, lots of horror movies as of now. But then again, I love them all. Especially during the Halloween season.

Oof..

So, ye. This was awfully short, sorry :(

I didnt really have a lot of thought for this, but uh, I hope it's "good"

edit: 05/27/18

so i changed the name of this chapter, because i didn't like the title it had before. I'm going to be going through the rest of this story and making little editions and stuff, but i just wanted it to be noted! "*insert original name here bby*" no longer exists, so, oh well. :)

edited & revised 8/18/18