Other Half •• Fillie

{13}

A/N: Yo!! People are still reading the stories I publish like a month ago, that makes me really happy😘! Plus! Sorry for not updating...I really do try my best but I know that I need to try a little bit harder.  Enjoy this chapter😘👑

Millie's POV
Finn's sudden words calm me down. As long you're with me you're pain, the voices in your head, all the demons you face, all of that will disappear. I got you babygirl...I promise I got you. I replay them over and over in my head. Still being able to hear his voice as I do so.
  My breathing calms down and I loosen my grip on Finn. He has the power to take anything I feel away from me, he just doesn't understand that yet. He doesn't understand that his touch gives me butterflies. He doesn't understand that his voice makes me want to just stop what I'm doing and just listen to him forever. He doesn't understand that even though I feel pain, the pain is easily demolished whenever he comes into view. He has this strange affect on me, that I've never felt, ever. He makes me want to thank the heavens and god, for making such a sweet, kind hearted, and very fucking attractive boy.
  "Millie baby are you ok?" Finns soft voice asks me as he cups my cheek. Oh how I want nothing more but to feel his soft lips on mine....Wait did he just call me baby? Or am I hearing shit?
  "Millie baby answer me, you're scaring me." No!he just did it again! I knew I wasn't going crazy. Finn Wolfhard just called me baby..and I..I..liked it.
  "Finn I'm sorry." I simply say. Recalling the events that happened.
  "Millie what are you apologizing for?" He asks as he tilts his head, truly confused.
"For ever entering your life. For being that one load that you can't seem to eat rid of. For worrying you so much...so much that you fear for me. I'm sorry for making you cry in the janitors closet when you saw me like that. I'm sorry for screaming bloody hell. I'm sorry for being this depressed little girl that you have to take care off. I'm just sorry for everything I've ever pulled you into. I've only been close to you for like five days, and I'm already ruining your life, your friends lives, everything. All my life I've caused so much pain to so many people, some including my parents. I've ruined so many relationships it's unbearable. I don't want to be the girl who's known for pulling you in then pushing you away. The more you stay connected to me the more you'll just get hurt..and I don't want to see you hurt..so I'm sorry Finn but I can't do this anymore. I can't keep myself connected to you knowing that you'll get hurt in the end..and I don't want to risk your feelings. I don't want to risk anyone's feelings. It's been one hell of a ride with you baby boy, but this ride has broken down and I gotta leave you to figure things out on your own. I'm sorry..I really am. You'll always be that one person who understands me more then god himself." The words spill out faster then ever. The feelings that I never wanted to escape my lips. I felt so many great things with Finn, but why did I just break him off, because I knew that those great things would be replaced by something horrible. And as horrible as it sounds...he can't have me...I can't have him...
"No." Finns says as he stops me from struggling to get up.
"No what." At this point, everyone has left the room and it's only me and Finn.
"No. You don't get to do that."
"Do what?" I say.
"Leave my life like that! You can't do that, I call bull, bull bull bull, it's all bullshit!" He says as he flares his hands in the air.
"Finn I-"
"NO! Millie do you understand what you do to me?! Do you understand that a single touch from you makes my heart skip multiple beats?! Do you understand that your voice snaps me into a trance I can never seem to not be in. Do you understand that you are literally the only person to ever understand my feelings, to ever understand that there was more to me then just some guy. Millie fuck hurting me, what about hurting you?! Every time you are out of my sight, something bad happens and MILLIE I JUST CAN'T TAKE IT! I can't take looking into your eyes as you try to catch a single breath. I can't take telling you everything will be ok, knowing that I can't say that because I DON'T KNOW IF EVERYTHING WILL BE OK! Millie I can't take you saying that you don't want to hurt me, and I can't take you apologizing for just being you! I could careless about you hurting me...I just want to protect you, I need to protect you Millie. I made a promise that I would always protect you, and that I'll always hold you in my arms when times are fucked. Millie I made that promise not so you would want to be with me, but so you'll understand that I really do care for you, that I really do got you. Millie understand that you can't leave because I won't let you. Because I know that if I let you go, I'll loose the most important person in my life. I know if I let you go, you'll get hurt again and I'll hate myself all over again. Millie...you're not going anywhere." Finn wraps his arms around my waist and pulls me closer, out breaths bouncing off of each other's. I look into his eyes and get lost in them.
  "And that's final."
"Finn.."
"Millie if you say one more thing I swear to god."
"No finn I just..I think it's time you heard my story."