Chapter Four

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Mckinnley walked up the cobblestone front steps, as soon as her feet hit the porch the front door swung open widely and Ashlyn ran out.

"Mommy can we go now, can we...can we?"  Ashlyn hollered as she jumped up into McKinnley's arms and wrapped her tiny arms around her mother's neck. June was slowly but steadily cane in hand walking out on to the porch, she already looked like she had been to battle with the terror that clung her her own body. The sweet woman's hair was frazzled as she tried to blow her bangs out of the way, blueberry syrup smeared in perfect hand prints on her clean cream apron.

The ring of syrup that encircled Ashlyn's lips was evidence enough, that at least some of her breakfast made it into her stomach. Mckinnley remember the delicious homemade blueberry syrup that she enjoyed so much growing up. Memories of sitting around the breakfast table as she inhaled her meal so that she could hurry up and get outside to play with the animals.

"How about we get cleaned up real quick and then I'll take you around to see that animals, and give poor grandma a rest," Putting Ashlyn on her feet she held her sticky hands and helped her inside to clean up, winking at her grandma as she passed.

Moments later Ashlyn was running out the front door again all spit shinned clean and heading towards the chicken coop. Mckinnley followed behind at a slower pace, she wished she could bottle that energy Ashlyn had, she would be a millionaire.

Mckinnley showed how to get the eggs from the hens, feed the animals, brush Jasper, and even showed her how to milk a cow by hand. It took some getting use to since it had been a long time since Mckinnley accomplished this kind of task before. To see Ashlyn's eyes light up when the milk started to pool in the bottom of the stainless steel bucket was priceless.

"Do you know if you milk a brown cow you will get chocolate milk?"  Both girls turned their heads swiftly around to see Chase standing there with a large bag of feed hung over his shoulder. Mckinnley gazed at his arm that was holding the bag still, it looked like a boa constrictor had a tight grip on it's prey. A black barbwire tattoo could be seen around his large muscular bicep, once she realized she was staring she quickly turned around and stared into the bucket  of milk. Chase chuckled and a lopsided smile grew on his face, he looked down at the cute little girl that looked up at him with awe.

"Really, do you have a brown cow here. I wanna see the chocolate milk" Ashlyn replied with a glimmer of hope in her eyes.

"No honey they don't have one, go on up to the house for lunch I'll be up there in a minute" Mckinnley voiced as she picked up the bucket of milk, Ashlyn skipped out of the barn and towards the house. Mckinnley whipped her head around almost whipping Chase's face with her pony tail.

"Please don't put those kind of ideas in her head. I would appreciate it if you could keep those to yourself. Now I have to go explain to a five year old that chocolate milk doesn't come from chocolate cows." Mckinnley huffed

"I'm sorry ma'am I just remember my daddy telling me that story when I was little" Chase retored and as soon as he said it he wished he could take it back. The look on McKinnley's face was of distraught sadness but was quickly covered by anger.

"Just the same please don't tell my daughter those silly things"

"Yes ma'am"

Mckinnley stormed out of the barn carrying the bucket of milk and it sloshed from side to side, spilling over every side. Chase wondered if she would have any left by the time she got back to the big house. Chase sliced a large gouge in the bottom of the feed bag over the barrel where it was stored, once emptied he tossed the bag in the trash. His mind kept flashing back to the bright eyed little girl with her cute cheesy grin.

Chase loved kids and at one point thought he and Megan would end up having a family together. Kids to him were innocent before the world jaded them with termoil and hard life lessons. Seeing Ashlyn made him wish he had a child of his own right now. He wasn't getting any younger in his mind, before he would know it the chance of having kids would be gone.

Then his mind wondered to McKinnley, he felt bad for mentioning learning the chocolate milk thing from his own father. The sadness in her eyes was piercing and made his own heart drop to the ground, all he want to do was comfort her. While she was gone on her ride earlier with Jasper all Chase could think about was McKinnley. What would it be like to really get to know her, what made that woman tick? When she whipped her head around the sweet smell of her coconut and lime shampoo wafted in the air. For a moment in time Chase pictured being on a tropical beach with McKinnley basking in the warm sun.

"Hey Chase, where have you been?" Richard came into the barn flustered.

"I've been in here I just finished filling the feed container, what do you need?"

"Don needs your opinon about what to do about the cows getting out in the lower half of the field."

"I'll be there in a minute Rick"

"I saw the boss's granddaughter come storming out of the barn, what did you do to piss her off?" Richard asked point blankly as he took off his cowboy hat and ran his hand through he sweaty hair.

"None your damn business" Chase replied as he walked out of the barn.

***

June met McKinnley at the top of the stairs with a concerned look on her face, she looked at McKinnley's face and then down to the now almost empty bucket. June watched as her granddaughter stormed across the yard spilling milk with every step. June sent Chase in the barn with the excuse that she wanted to make sure the feed container was full for Ashlyn to help feed the animals. Knowing McKinnley and Ashlyn would be in there since she;s the one who also said she wanted fresh milk to make ice cream with.

Now seeing McKinnley's face, maybe that wasn't such the greatest of plans she had came up with so far.

"Well I guess ice cream is out of the question for tonight" June peered into the can once more as McKinnley huffed angrily. "What happened?"

"That Chase character put in Ashlyn's head that chocolate milk comes from brown cows, now I have to go in here, be the bear of bad news and tell her that it's not real." She sat roughly on the porch swing. June sat gingerly beside her laying her cane across her lap.

"How much is it going to hurt for Ashlyn to think chocolate milk comes from chocolate cows. really?" June inquired knowing the real answer.

"It won't"

"And if I remember correctly your grandpa told you the exact same thing when you were her age, and look you turned out perfectly normal. Don't go in there and crush that little girl's imagination because that's not the real reason your mad is it?"

McKinnley sat there for a moment in silence. She knew deep down she wasn't mad at Chase for telling her daughter the story.

"I'm mad....I'm mad for the fact that Jack wasn't the one who got to tell her. I'm pissed that some stranger that doesn't know her from Adam has gotten to tell her something her own daddy should have taught her. I'm furious that he was taken away from us so early, it's not fair to her or I. We were suppose to be a happy family, he and I were to grow old together." McKinnley pounded her fist on the arm of the swing. June placed her withered hand on McKinnley's leg.

"McKinnley honey, it's good to be mad. There is nothing wrong with being mad. You have hid your emotions away for so long they are just now starting to go through the motions. I know you miss Jack with all your heart but don't let his memory keep you from living your future. And don't take it out on the wrong people, no one is to blame." 

They sat there in silence for a few more minutes just letting everything sink in. Once McKinnley wiped the few stray tears that were left, both got up and headed into the house for lunch.

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