Gentleman (Jonathan Toews)

Left Broken Hearted

"I didn't know what to do, I came here as soon as I left his place. But I'm happy I did. I feel a little better" she says trying to give me a smile.

"Give this time to sink in, don't be afraid to feel bad for yourself. It'll get better but it's going to to hurt. Just know he will be back and you will be ready for him when he is" I say.

"Thank you. And there's one more thing I need to tell you" she says.

"Of course, what is it" I ask.

"I'm pregnant" she smiles and my eyes nearly pop out of my head.

"You're what" I gasp. I couldn't hear her over the shock.

"I am having a kid" she reiterated.

"I'm going to be a aunt" I whisper.

"You are. It should be here in February" she explains and I shake my head.

"So you're what... four months" I ask and she nods.

"Yeah" she smiles.

"What the fuck! That's so awesome! Does Patrick know" I wonder.

"Yeah. We've known for two months now, but that's why he wanted me to come with. He doesn't want to be gone when the baby gets here" she explains.

"Patrick is going to be a Dad" Jon asks and I roll my eyes.

"We've been over this" I laugh.

"Holy shit" he nearly yells.

"Yeah, pretty crazy huh" my sister chuckles.

"Are you guys going to move in together? Is he coming back when the baby is born? How are you going to work" I spit.

"I have no idea. I'm going to have to do this without him and it sucks" she sighs.

"I'm so sorry" Jon says.

"It's okay, I get it" she shrugs.

"No... I mean I'm sorry this is happening in the first place. I'm going to try really hard to get Patrick back home as soon as possible" he insists.

"Thanks Jon, that means a lot" my sister admits.

She collects herself and heads home. She texts me when she gets there because I'm crazy about people driving emotional. I grab a drink and look to cuddle but I can't find Jon.

I go up to our room and find him sitting on the bed. I sit next to him and he grabs my hand sets the drink down so he can hold me with both of his. He plays with my fingers as he continues to stare out into nowhere.

"What are you thinking about" I ask.

"I never thought about how bad this lockout is, and I'm not talking about hockey. Yeah, I miss it, but this is affecting more than my game. It's effecting families. People don't know when their husband is coming back, like you said peoples lives can't just stop because the nhl has. This affects everyone, the players, the families, the fans. It's October now and we haven't made any ground.

I know I make fun of Patrick because of how sensitive he can be but he really loves your sister. He's so excited to be a dad and now he might have to wait to be one. I can't imagine him being thousands of miles away from Bailey when the baby comes, that's not fair" he explains.

"It isn't, but it's life. It's a serious of questions and pressure to find some answers" I reply.

"I want answers" he insists.

"You want what's best for everyone, and there's no answer for that" I say.

"I know... I just-" he stops. "What if I lose you too" he asks.

"Are you leaving" I ask.

"No, but things happen. Something could happen" he defends.

"We can't worry about the uncertain" I defend.

"Everything about the future is uncertain" he reminds me.

"And that's why we live in the moment, because we can actually have a say in that" I try.

I grab his face and pull it to me and see tears in his eyes. I know this was so impossibly hard for him. He has such a huge heart and he wants what is best for everyone. But that's impossible to obtain.

"I keep thinking about what if that was me. What if I had to go play over seas and you had to stay and you were pregnant with my child. That is a decision no man should have to make" he sighs.

"That's life baby, and I know it's hard. But everything happens for a reason" I explain.

"Can you promise me something" he asks.

"Of course" I assure him.

"No matter what happens in the future... never change" he begs and I smile.

"I wouldn't dream of it."