To Die For (A Jace Wayland Love Story) -discontinued-

~ 3 ~

My mind ran wild trying to digest what he just uttered.

"There you go Lex." He sighed before he hunched forwards.

My eyes wide open I stared at him mindlessly, trying to comprehend whatever the hell was going on.

"Jace."

His name that came out effortlessly for so many years came out the hardest, hardly a whisper.

His eyes found mine, an obvious guilt spread across all over his face.

Something was off.

Then...

...it clicked.

"This isn't necessary. Don't beat yourself up. Lately you vocalise my feelings for you much more than I do myself." I tried to speak as confidently as possible to hide the disappointment whilst I tried to fake a smile but failed both attempts miserably.

This was painful. It was easier to cope with the fact that he wasn't in love with me but this was agonizing. It made me feel pitiful. He was pretending to be in love with me. Making me feel like a drenched kitten in a cold winter night.

"I mean it." No. He didn't.

Everything gave him away. His voice, his face, his body language and worst of all, his eyes. He was continuing to lie to me. He wasn't a liar. He truly wasn't. He was who he was and always spoke truthfully no matter how painful the truth was. That also changed along with him trying to become a better person. Now he lies, to "protect" others. Oh the irony.

"I'd rather have you as a friend than a lying lover."

My words came out as sour as they could possibly be. A wind brushed my face as a tear won it's war against me and dropped on my shirt leaving a dark circle stain.

His blonde hair swayed in the air along with the wind.

He opened his mouth but closed it almost immediately. He knew this was wrong. I knew this was wrong.

He sighed and turned around to take couple of steps away from me only to turn around again to face me.

"I know. I'm so stupid. I shouldn't have listened-" Then he cut himself off in mid sentence. Realizing what he just spilled.

"Who?" I asked raising my perfectly shaped eyebrow. After all I did have Izzy as my best friend.

"Doesn't matter."

"So someone told you to act like you're "in love" with me? Someone clearly knows nothing about me. Nor you! You're Jace Wayland! Not some kind of a melodrama character." I spoke harshly as I took my steps towards him and stopped only inches away from his face.

"She thought that'd bring you back." He quietly spoke shifting his gaze away from me. It was like some sort of a tag game but for eyes.

Why couldn't he look at me? Was I that hopeless?

"She?" He looked dead serious in my eyes. He knew I was going to bitch about her. I was going to bitch about her. Because, I was a bitch.

"You wouldn't expect me to believe this is Isabelle, would you?" I sassed, crossing my arms giving him one of my most intimidating looks.

"We were out of ideas Alex and this is going to be my very last attempt. You're right I'm nothing like people from melodramas. I kill demons. And inevitably, I'm still in love with Clary."

I sighed then looked down before I closed the space between us. I reached for a hug. Not immediately but soon enough his arms found my back. That probably caught him by surprise. I could imagine him thinking this as the last thing I would do right now. If it was another time yeah, that's right. But every beginnings deserve a farewell when comes to an end.

"Let's hope I will make it in the Silent City." His grip tightened on my back.

"Don't do this Lex." His voice became shaky. His breath caressed my ear as he spoke.

"It's okay. I know this will work. Trust me." I backed up a little to face him. "This plan is going to work. I will leave a legacy, what else could I ask for?" I smiled as a tear escaped my eye. He swiped it delicately. His beautiful plump lips were pursed while his brows were furrowed with worry.

"We can do it together. And we will. No one has to die if it's us all. Come on Alex." I diverted my gaze to avoid his beautifully designed golden eyes.

"Goodbye Jace." I hugged him again. After a long moment I tried to free myself from him but he locked me in. "It's enough." He just stood there, engulfing me in him.

"Jace I don't like long goodbyes." I attempted to push him off.

"You're making this harder." It was getting harder to contain my desperation.

"Jace, let me go!" I started to tremble, I didn't want to cry but this was pure agony.

"Jace!"

"I'll come with you." He whispered. "If you're going to die. I will die with you."

"You, you can't leave others behind."

"I can't lose you." This was the final straw. I pushed him away with all my will power, succeeding at last.

"You, are unstable. Making ME unstable. I'm pushing you away. I want to leave and you decide to bring my importance. I wasn't important when you screwed all those girls. I wasn't important when Clary brought herself into out lives and took you away. I wasn't important when you constantly made out with her in front of me. I know I sound like a bitter ex girlfriend but you are the reason why I'm acting like this. Ever since that day you've always took this lightly. Took everything about me lightly. I didn't expect some sort of love from you. I was ready to move on but you kept giving me hope and backing up since you're madly in love with her leave, me, ALONE. Remember when I was back from Council almost was prisoned because of her. It took you 3 days to come and say "Are you okay?". We're not even friends let alone lovers? I always have known that wasn't going to happen. You're full of shit. So full of yourself, even I can't stand it anymore."

Tears were falling down uncontrollably, blurring my vision. I stood still panting and trembling. Since when was I this unstable? How come he had such an affect on me?

"Please, stop interfering with my life from now on. At all costs." I begged along with some violent hiccups. I hated how weak I was.

A few moments later I finally collected myself together for a short time but enough time to let go of something on my chest.

"You're no good for me nor for yourself. If you didn't drop those three words earlier I'd think you're actually properly in love with me. But you're not. If you want to be useful keep quiet about the Silent City. Especially from Izzy. She won't know." With my finger pointed at him in a threatening manner as I spoke with the last bits of the strength I had left within me.

His figure stayed stiffly in what it seemed like an uncomfortable position, his mouth a little agape and his breathing fast, simply stunned by the backlash he received. He knew this was goodbye and he knew he was supposed to take sides. I didn't want him to but this whole thing made it occur this way.

"I can't promise anything Alex."

"But you will."

~ Last AN ~
So....I happened to find a draft for chapter 3. I was done with this story. For the time being, I still am. I started writing after I watched the movie years ago, I was very inspired lol. I'm sorry for disappointing you. Since it was written already, I decided to give you this bonus chapter as an apology. It was written around the time I was still invested in it so the vibe seems the same. Stay safe. x