Carmen an 8 year old girl who lost her mother to the cold hands of death. Her father being scared not to loose his only daughter locked her up in their enormous house. She had no access to the outside world and decided to make her fathers library he...
I stood there gawking at my reflection in the mirror. My chest was fuller, waist slimmer and my hips wider. My small body frame didn't alter any of my features. I was now a full grown woman, ready to take the world head on. (Carmen)
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I heard the oh so familiar footsteps as i dashed to my wardrobe and pulled out a dress to wear.
It would be uncomfortable for the maids to see me naked. Even though they're the only people I have seen in years apart from my father.
My two personal maids Martha and magdalene walked in with dinner i suppose.
I've been in my room reading all day and i didn't seem to notice time fly. "I must see my father at once" i said to myself as i swiftly walked out of the room paying no attention to the maids who came to attend to my needs.
I skipped through the hallways joyfully, i could almost be mistaken for a happy child but i was far from that. I knew nothing about happiness only the ones i read in scenes of bulky novels which had unending scenes.
I would read "the one"- by Kiera Cass or "the will"- by Kristen Ashley over and over just so I'd get a glimpse of what a never ending happiness felt like.
Times without number, i would ask my father to teach me about happiness but it seemed he knew nothing about it either. How would he know happiness when I've watched his light and joyfulness fade away.
He lost my mother 11 years ago in a car accident. The memory is a bit blur but all i could remember is him coming to pick me up from school, saying we needed to go home immediately.
I was 8 years old in grade 4 and didn't know what was happening and he didn't tell me either.
That was the last day i ever went to school or even stepped out of the house. He gave the maids and workers strict, specific instructions not to let me out of the house.
Whenever i asked him why i stopped leaving the house, he said "dangerous people everywhere my sweetling, in here you'd remain forever safe and no harm shall ever come to you"
I thought to myself oh how much my father loved me. I was too young and to naive to understand the selfish reason for his act.
I didn't have a childhood, i didn't interact with people my age or play games and dress up with my friends, i didn't have dolls neither did i have doll tea parties and play pretend.
I was forced to grow up at a tender age, I started reading bulky novels since the age of 8. Since when the words seemed too long and impossible to pronounce, when i couldn't understand the scenes because i felt they were too absurd and didn't make any sense.
I would sit in my fathers large library and read, his library was my place of comfort, my home, my friend, my partner and companion.
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If i wanted to laugh, the library was the place. Or if I wanted to cry or know what it feels like to be inlove or happy.
Father would walk in on me reading many a times and joke about me drowning in books, he would ask me how many books I've read and i never gave him an answer cause i had lost count, it was then it dawned on to me that i was really drowning in books. The books i have read are over 1,000 and still counting.
If i could go back in time, i would read those books again to relive the adrenaline in my system when two lovers take the greatest of risk because of the love they feel for each other.
I knocked on the beautifully designed wooden door and walked in without waiting for a response. The knock was just a polite gesture for father has groomed me into a young fine lady.
"Good day father" i raised my dress and bent my knee as a sign of respect.
"My sweetling, i haven't seen you all day, you were lost in your world of books, I suppose"
"Yes father! You know me too well"
"If i did not what kind of a father would i be"
"Then father, you must know what tomorrow is i suppose"
"What is tomorrow my little sweetling"
"I will be turning 20 tomorrow father, i ask of nothing but to go outdoors and experience life for myself.. to feel what the writers wrote about in the bulky novels, please father, that is all i ask of you"
I could see my fathers expression turn into an ugly frown, the type he'd give whenever he was mad at me.
"Please father, forgive my request. It was a stupid thing for me to ask for, i love staying indoors and reading tons of book, i love knowing that I'm safe in here with you and no harm will ever come to us" i looked up at my father and the frown was being slowly covered by a faint smile
His wrinkled cheeks and thin lips.
"I will not loose you like i lost your mother" father spoke "i would never let such a mistake repeat itself"
"But it wasn't your fault father. It was bound to happen"
"Nooooo"! Father covered his face with his palms "it was my fault i lost your mother little sweetling, i didn't protect her enough"
Fathers palm was sweaty and his fingers fidgety. He always reacted like that whenever i talked about my mother.
Her death affected him dearly, he was almost loosing his mind because he acted crazy and abnormal sometimes.
"Dinner has been served father, would you come have tea with me in my room"?
"Very well sweetling, I'd be there in no time, run along now" he rubbed my blonde hair as i left his room and headed straight to my room, to prepare for a tea date with my father.
Not long after, father walked in with a smile. The tea table was set.
I served us both hot tea, tea of one of the finest kinds, after all father could afford it and even more.
We were talking lightly, basically talking about irrelevant things while sipping the hot tea.
When father started choking on his own saliva, he held his throat and i could see his veins become visible on his forehead. His eyes were blood shot.
He wanted to speak but he couldn't , he stretched out his hand to me but i swatted it away.
The poison worked faster than i thought it would. In minutes i would be free to explore the outside world, which he has tried so hard to restrict me from.
For how long did he think he could keep me "locked away" I didn't want a boring life, i wanted to live an adventurous love life like in "wuthering heights" where their love was wild passionate and almost demonic.
I looked back at father and he had stopped struggling, his lifeless body laid there. I poisoned my own father! He now knows what if feels like to be dead.. all the years he locked me here i have been dead inside.
He had to be dead for me to be truly alive.
Being the sole heir to his fortune, i have now become stinkingly rich, rich enough to buy my self a state.
I packed everything i could possibly need, and some of my favorite books and left at once. as for the house, the maids could have it as a reward for their years of loyal service.
