The Burden Of Love (Jonathan Toews)

Strength. 3

I know my efforts might be futile, but I am passionate about what I do. These kids, they're our future. I can send them out into this world feeling better about themselves and more prepared and that's what I strive for. Not every kid wants help and I get it. But a kid like Kenneth who is just starting to make their impact needs help doing so. I'm just trying to be the help" she explains.

I hang on her every word as I watch her soft pink lips move up and down. Her strawberry blonde hair sitting under a white hat with a big Pom Pom on it. Listening to someone talk about something they care about, it's refreshing. Because the NHLPA meetings we've been having the last few months have lacked compassion and focus. I honestly didn't believe that people still cared about things in the way she does. From the moment we met I knew something was different about her. In a time where people do things for money or because they have to she does them because it's right and she wants to.

"I wish I had a teacher like you. These kids are lucky" I insist.

"A lot of them, like Kenneth, don't have a good home life. They want to be at school because that's where they feel safe or understood. Kids shouldn't be faking illnesses to miss school, it shouldn't be a place kids fear. In my classroom no one is judged and we celebrate our differences. If I like green and Kenny likes brown we don't make fun of him because he's different. We celebrate that he stands behind his decision even if we don't agree.

I'm one of like ten white people in that entire school. I know I'm the minority but that's only when I'm there. Those kids leave and they're the minority. Labeled as troubled or from the projects or uneducated. Until I know that these kids are stepping into a better world than the one they have at school I won't stop" she claims.

"You're a saint" I try.

"I'm a human who knows what it's like to feel so belittled they don't feel like a human. And I know what it takes to make sure no one else will know what that feels like" she claims.

"So what made you like this? So knowledgeable and kind" I wonder. Because no one gets this close to being a saint without some shit happening.

"Why do you want to know so bad" she counters. We've only talked twice in person after all. We texted some but never in depth like this.

"Because I've been around this city and ran into a lot of people. Many of them great in their own right. But I've never seen someone carrying the weight of the world on their shoulders like you do. And you might be struggling but you're doing it. That little boy over there thinks you're heaven sent and I'm starting to think he's onto something. But no one gets to this point without having the weight of the world being heavily felt" I try.

"There's a lot of reasons I ended up here in this position. I was a lot like Kenneth when I was growing up. Didn't really know of a life with my parents. I got dropped off at my grandparents house one day and never really made it back home. But it was a blessing in disguise because my grandparents loved me with their whole hearts. They taught me everything I know. From the age of seven on it was just me and them trying to figure out life.

My grandma told me "respect everyone and everything around you. We get this one life and this one planet. We should nurture both, grow both and never apologize for doing what it takes to help others. For our heart and our minds is what sets us apart." And she was right, more than she knew.

But my grandparents got older and my grandma passed away. I moved my grandpa into a nice assisted living home not too far from here. He is getting close to joining his wife, he misses her a lot. But there's so much hatred and pain in this world he can't leave it just yet. Not until it's a little bit better" she explains.

"So if you could have it your way, what would you do to make the world a better place so he can leave in peace" I question.

She just gives me the most blinding smile as her hazel eyes meet my brown ones. "I just want everyone to feel love, true love. Then maybe there wouldn't be as many bad people in this world" she says.

"You're so sweet it's actually kind of sickening" I joke as she giggles. "But I like that about you. I really do."

"Thanks. Not a lot of people get me but not a lot of people take the time to either. And I never thought in a million years someone like you would be so understanding" she claims.

"Someone like me" I ask. "Like a professional athlete?"

"Someone who doesn't see every day the ugly in life. You have your world you're focused on then there's a whole different world going on a few streets over. I'm not saying that you don't have hardships or that you're insensitive to the reality of this city, but not even I compare to these kids. I see every day just how bad the system is and how it's made so that they never get out of it. I honestly didn't believe that people who don't have to worry about these kinds of things do" she further explains.

"Honestly I didn't up until I met you" I admit.

"And why am I different" she questions.

"Because until recently I thought no one was actually kind. I thought everyone's motivation was in vain or despite of someone else. Then I met you and you are just a good person. You get nothing from taking Kenneth in besides the satisfaction that the kid is being properly cared for. It doesn't take much to notice what you're doing for him. Good people changes people" I try.

"Oh" she blushes.

"I hope you know what you're doing matters. Just as much as what I do" I insist.

"I don't want recognition or money or anything like that. I want to change lives" she says.

"You are" I assure her.

"And how do you know that" she wonders.

"Because you're changing mine too" I insist.