Panda Love

Coffee or Tea: Part 1

"Zeiryn, can you get the coffee going, please?"

"Of course. I was just adding water to the coffee pot so I could be that person who puts water in a coffee pot but doesn't make coffee."

"Just make it strong and hold the lip," sighs Rob turning away and heading back into the studio. In an effort to follow directions, I salute his back and proceed to add the fifth and final scoop of grounds to the filter. After I close the top of the coffee maker and start it to brew, I look around for my mug. I'll be damned if I don't get the first cup today. Usually I leave the machine to do its thing and come back for coffee later, but today is different. Today we are hosting a "big name." Today I need to be on my "best behavior." Today can kiss my whole ass and move on already.

I know I should not have went out last night. I know I should not have had those last 3 drinks, but coffee was made to fix those mistakes. It's not as if this job is my whole life. I'm not even regular staff, I'm an intern. I've been working at WMBW for Rob and Sue in the Mornings for well over a year with the promise that I'll get to be on the radio and learn broadcasting hands-on. It's an admittedly boring aspiration but I just love the platform and I want to be involved. Rob and Sue want me to make coffee and make it strong like a good little intern. Rob and Sue can really make a girl reconsider her aspirations.

As the last gurgles push out of the coffee maker and I still have not found my mug. I start to panic because I know today is not the day to turn out. Today, I'm supposed to blend into the radio office world and keep out of the way. In my mind, I know it's a test. I know Rob or Sue or Jimmy or Shelley or somebody else who already knows the deal, has my mug and they just want to watch my reaction. The problem with that is we've been down this road before. I went to a $375 pottery and wine class when I was in college and made that mug. That mug made it through long, late nights, 2 dramatic throws and countless other slamming downs. That mug is like family, it has a history and it's mine. I've covered all of this with Rob and Sue and Jimmy and Shelley and everyone else who tries to use it.

At this point I know what I have to do. Shaking my head and refraining from making a lot of noise because I was late this morning and the on air sign is lit, I throw out every single cup and mug in the break room. Not content with that level of petty, I take the garbage out and make sure I throw the bags hard enough to shatter every mug.

Tim Horton's is across the street, so I go there and get my medium triple triple with hazelnut. I begin to realize I may have overreacted once the caffeine hits my system and I notice that the radio station parking lot and street out front are packed with teenage girls holding signs and screaming. Ed Sheeran was coming in today. He's promoting his new album and "hanging out" all morning with us. Today is a "big day."

Well shit, today might be the day I get fired so I text my best friends, Navey and Ruari, asking them to pray for me at work, like true besties I get the immediate replies "Amen!" and "Jesus be a fence!" giving me the strength to walk back in there and face the music, literally and figuratively of course.

While on my sojourn to Tim Horton's and back, Rob has sent Shelley, another intern to find me. Poor Shelley, I watch her as she's in full freak out mode, scrambling around and asking people if they've seen me. I decide to end her misery and make my presence known. She dramatically sighs and proceeds to inform me that she's been looking all over for me. To which I reply, "For what? I'm not the other in-studio intern. Where's Andrew?"

"Oh my God! Where have you been?!? Andrew called off today! He had to take his poor little chihuahua to the vet because he choked down a condom and was throwing up all last night. The condom had to be surgically removed this morning. Andrew wanted to stay home and comfort his little chihuahua. Of course Rob and Sue totally understood and let him take the morning off but then you were late and Ed showed up early and everyone has just been running around like a chicken with no head and you just disappear-"

"Shelley, for the love of God and caffeine, girl you need to breathe," I interrupt her.

"But Rob sent me to get you because he needs coffee."

"Hmm, that's going to be a problem because all the mugs and cups are gone," I inform her.

For an honest to God minute Shelley says nothing, she's just staring at me waiting for the joke to end. Poor Shelley. "You're serious!? Oh my God you're serious??"

Walking away to leave Shelley open mouth and panicking, I decide to keep a low profile and maybe they'll put another intern to use. There's Brenda, Jacob, Nathaniel (not Nathan), Tyler and Karel. Only Shelley and Andrew are allowed in the studio. Shelley and Andrew are at the top of the intern hierarchy. Then it's Karel and Nathaniel who write the "jokes and bits" of the show, me and Tyler who research "interesting and relevant facts and anything that needs researched", while Jacob and Brenda do "grunt work" i.e. get coffee and run errands. Listen I know my role and I do it well. It's not up to me to sweat the coffee situation. No one here knows or cares that I'm more than a "level 3" intern. Rob can ask but that don't mean Rob receives.

I sign onto my personal laptop to check on my baby. I'm a founder and CEO of The Collective, which is the an digital media and publishing company responsible for successfully launching the independent careers of writers, journalists, graphic and web designers as well as publishing some of the most relevant and trending news points and stories. The Collective is an independent publishing forum that allows artists of all types to create, share and explore their works and the works of others. The Collective is the baby of me and 2 besties, Navey and Ruari. During junior year of college we started our own business to get a jump start on student loan payments. In just over 5 years the long nights and hard work is finally paying off. Don't get me wrong I love seeing what The Collective has grown into but, we 3 besties are ready for the full harvest of our labor if you know what I saying.

I know, I know. I'm a complex rich, young, black woman, I have a successful online company but I work as an under appreciated intern. In all honesty I started interning at WMBW to gain experience and to determine if expanding into radio broadcasting was a wise investment. After actually working here for a year and gaining no on air experience, I'm losing interest and patience fast.

I'm busy checking emails and directing an online company. Shelley is busy deciding to make an even bigger scene. I'm assuming it's a news/commercial break because Rob, Sue, Jimmy and Shelley are leaving the studio. I have a gut feeling that it's about to go down, when out of the studio walks Ed Sheeran carrying my mug. Now my original plan was to lay low, but all that goes out the window when I see Ed Sheeran holding my mug.

Immediately I'm up approaching the scene, eyes for my mug only, when Shelley throws me under the bus, "I mean I don't know what happened to the mugs and cups. They were all here when I got Ed some tea this morning. I know I was working extra for Andrew not being here, but I think I would have noticed missing mugs and cups. Besides Zeiryn was definitely in here because she made coffee so I'm sure she would have said something if they were missing and she definitely wouldn't have made coffee."

Rob is no fool. Throughout Shelley's whole spiel he along with Sue, Jimmy and now Ed Sheeran are staring at me. He asks me, "What did you do?"

I'm still on the fence between admitting the truth and cold denial, but Ed Sheeran says, "How do you know she did anything? That seems a little rude you know."

"Yeah Rob how do you know I did anything but make the coffee strong and hold my lip?"

Pointing at Ed Sheeran he says, "Because he has your mug."

____________________________________
A/N
Hey Sheerios,
Couple things, first off I refer to Ed by first and last name because right now Zeiryn still thinks of him that way. Shelley calls him Ed because she feels like she can but I wanted to kind of distance Zeir and Ed in the beginning.
Secondly please point out inconsistencies and mistakes because try as you might to edit you can't catch everything.
Lastly please like and comment and share and all that jazz!
Love ya!
KayNaomi

P.S. I'm no tech expert or entrepreneur so I completely made up The Collective and how it works. If you or someone you know uses this as a model for actual business please excuse the coincidence. Also please don't copy my work. If The Collective idea inspires you please give credit where it's due!