Have Faith

Chapter 16

Once everything was settled, Cassian was going to drop down on one knee and propose properly. He had not purchased a ring. Faith had not responded positively to the last ring that Cassian had presented her with. Instead Cassian had spent fifteen thousand pounds on a glorious new life for them.

Cassian had been planning on presenting Faith with the key to their new home in Norwood, Derbyshire.

And now that key was settled in his desk drawer, never to be utilised.

Cassian was most unsettled. He had promised Faith that he would protect her and Lucy, and he would keep that promise, but he had a funny feeling. Life could not go on as it once had. Too much had changed.

This secret was of huge proportions. If it was ever discovered that Anne Pendleton was still alive, the repercussions would be enormous. George Pendleton's embarrassment was what concerned Cassian the most. The shame and humiliation that a man experienced after the abandonment of his wife was great. What would George would do to Faith if he ever got his hands on her again?

Cassian would give his own life before that happened.

"What are you staring at?"

Cassian was snapped out of his daydream when Faith had spoken to him.

Faith had finished her chores and was now sitting on the floor with Lucy. She was smiling at him, looking as beautiful as ever, and she was as married as she always would be. Cassian willed himself to stop thinking so impurely. What sins he was amassing.

"What do you say we wander down to the church and gift those books to the children," Cassian suggested, though he was not entirely sure how sensible it would be for him to walk into a church coveting as he was.

Faith had ordered enough books for each child to have two with her fifteen shilling Christmas present.

"I suppose the weather is better today," Faith agreed, peering out his window. It had been pouring with rain all week and Faith had not wanted to take a risk in bringing Lucy outdoors.

Faith smiled at him again, the same smile she had been giving him at least half a dozen times a day since she had revealed to him her true identity. They seemed to say "I am sorry, but thank you." Cassian knew that Faith was grateful to him.

The selfish part of him again was telling him that George Pendleton had to die someday. Perhaps Cassian could marry Faith when they were in their fifties.

Thirty years. What a horrible thought.

"Go and fetch your cloaks. I will meet you downstairs."

Faith left the study carrying Lucy and Cassian made his way down to the foyer. He ducked into the library and went to collect his copy of Utopia. His mother, the good woman that she was, had ensured that her son had been taught to read. Utopia had inspired him as a young man. It helped him to believe that those of simple means and low birth could amount to something when given the chance.

Cassian's thoughts went to the boy he had met upon his last visit to the church. Kit reminded Cassian so much of himself. Cassian was certain that this book could help him. As Faith would put it, it could inspire Kit to make something of himself.

"Oh, forgive me, sir." Mr Wade had begun to retreat out of the library when he had seen it was occupied.

"No, no, Wade. Please," beckoned Cassian. "I am just leaving. In fact, Mrs Rowe and I will be out this afternoon if you could excuse her."

Cassian knew exactly what Mr Wade was thinking. He knew what all the servants thought. Cassian was not well practiced in concealing his particular favouritism for Faith. He knew it was not conventional for a master to spend such time with a housemaid. Cassian trusted his household not to talk, but to outsiders, he knew what it would look like.