I Am Sorry

I am sorry.

I am sorry for every time I mistook you for something granted.

I am sorry for every time I wasn't there when you needed me.

I am sorry that I wasn't there when your mother died.

I am sorry that I wasn't there when you held her hand, while she left our world.

I am sorry for yelling at you to stop crying over her death.

Every tear you shed felt like a knife piercing through my heart.

I am sorry for calling you a whore, after you talked to that one guy.

I am sorry for beating him up in front of your eyes, while you screamed at me to stop.

I am sorry.

I didn't know it was your cousin.

Every bruise on his body is marked inside of me.

I will never forget how you held him and cried.

I will never forget how you looked at me afterwards -

Like I was a monster.

I am sorry for making you lose your job.

I am sorry that I needed you that day.

I knew how important it was for you but I was still selfish.

I am sorry I made you stop seeing your friends.

I am sorry never understanding you.

I never knew you were in so much pain.

I should have cared.

I was never the best boyfriend.

I can't even remember how we got together in the first place.

You were so sweet and caring.

I was too.

You smiled at me brightly and I fell in love with that smile.

You looked at me with your beautiful eyes and I got lost in them.

Your voice sounded like the one of an angel.

Your laugh was something I wanted to hear all the time.

I ran my hands through your soft hair and thought of a cloud.

I couldn't get enough of our sweet, tender kisses.

Your thin arms around my neck when you hugged me.

Your soft purr when we cuddled.

I miss all of it.

I am sorry for not protecting you.

I am sorry for failing.

It's my fault.

I don't deserve to sit here at your grave and mourn.

It was all my fault.

Please, Aibou.

Please come back.

I am sorry.