G's Patience

Chapter 5

I looked at Trevor. He had a goofy smile, and I was in awe of how he could so easily wander out of his house and coolly stride into my backyard without a second thought. I paced back and forth, thinking of what to do. I wasn't about to get myself into a heap of trouble because of a moronic choice on his part, so I had him sit against the wall at the side of the house where he was surely not to be seen. And along with my frustration came paranoia. I stopped pacing and decided to sit down beside him. I put my fingers to my forehead before finally saying,

"You're absolutely insane, Trevor," I whispered as I looked up at the sky and I looked back at him. "What made you think this was a good idea?"

"I didn't," he whispered back, looked down at the ground and chuckled. I saw that goofy smile of his. But I still could not get over the fact that this undeniably insane boy completely ignored his conscience and waltzed out his front door, despite the fact that he knew the stupidity of his actions. So I asked,

"Then why on earth did you do it?" I couldn't wrap my head around this absurd choice of his.

"I wanted to see you."

"Alright, that's sweet. That's really sweet but you need to have a little more common sense than this, Trevor. If my parents wake up and find you here, you're dead. Then I'm dead."

This bizarre boy in my backyard, though incredibly charming, obviously was unaware of how controlling my parents are capable of being. My panic shot through the roof when I heard a noise come from around the corner. I sat there, frozen and silent. But It was just my dog.

I let out a sigh of relief.

"You need to relax, G. You're too tense, just enjoy the moment."

"How on earth can I? You and I both knew this was a bad idea. And I get bad anxiety when dealing with bad ideas." The angrier I became, the louder my whispers were.

"I can see that," he smirked, "but your parents won't wake up unless you give them a reason to."

"I just don't understand how you can just do something like this. I could never do this."

"I've grown fond of it."

"Well, I'm certainly not fond of it right now. But trust me, if I ever snuck out, all hell would break lose."

"It would be fine."

"No, I assure you. I'd imagine, even though my parents never wake up in the middle of the night, they would wake up the one night I try to sneak out because that's just my luck. They would call each and every one of my friends, my family members, and my friends' family members in search of me, and possibly look through my room to find something that could give them a hint to my whereabouts. Then they would drive all over L.A. and never go back to sleep until, either I'm found, or I come home. And once I was found, I would be grounded, the car would be taken away, and I would be sent to counseling for being such a rebellious and evil hooligan teenager and sorry excuse for a daughter. So don't tell me it would be fine. Because it wouldn't. And that is exactly why I have never snuck out before. Because unlike all the other rebels out there, I think of consequences. And I would rather stay home and be boring, then make a stupid mistake and have to deal with the stupid consequences."

Trevor silently sat for a few seconds and finally said,

"So you're parents are the ones keeping you from living your life."

This conversation repulsed me. I could never imagine someone could have this amount of disrespect for authority. I love my parents and they love me and care for me and my future. They are ensuring that my life is perfectly laid out, and they care about my success and want me to reach my goals. They were simply keeping me from ruining my life.

"Yeah," I responded. "Yeah, they are." I stopped for a second to look back at the stars, and I took a deep breath and continued, "I just wish I could go out every once in a while and live the life I was meant to. I want to go on adventures. I want to go out and do something with my life. All these other people are going to parties, making friends, getting the high school experience, and here I am. At home. And each time I look out my window at night, I always see the stars and wonder why on earth I can't just go out and look at them from somewhere other than my bedroom window. But I never can. I can only stay at home, and I hate it, but I can't do anything about it."

I laid my head in my hands. My throat felt dry and my vision slightly blurred from the build-up in my eyes. I bit my lip in an attempt to hold back any more sign of emotion and frustration. I breathed deeply through my nose and just kept staring at the stars. And I became envious of the stars, for they were up in the sky, far away, and free- and I was not. I held my breath to keep everything in, and the lump in my throat grew bigger and my lips quivered as I swallowed it down. Then I closed my eyes. I took a deep breath in, and when I opened my eyes again, I felt a stream roll down my cheek. I choked out a small laugh because I realized, all my life, being smart, also made me a coward. I looked down at my hands and furrowed my eyebrows. "Why can't I do something spontaneous for once?"

I looked at Trevor again. He just looked back at me with caring eyes. Then he smirked.

"I have another idea." He announced. I knew exactly where he was going with this, and the words that then escaped my lips were ones that I was going to regret for the rest of the night.

"I can't," I whispered. And I cried.

Trevor took me in his arms and stroked my arm in an attempt to comfort me as I laid my head on his chest. I felt like such a coward. I felt pathetic. But the feeling of Trevor's embrace and the sound of the wind once again soothed my thoughts and calmed my breathing, so I sat there in Trevor's arms.

"You're beautiful." He finally spoke. I laughed.

"It's true," he went on, "G, you are beautiful. And we don't have to be out on an adventure for anyone to see that." I heard the words come out of his mouth and I listened to his heart beat at the same time, I felt his chest rise and fall with each of his breaths. He put his hand on my cheek and I looked up into his eyes.

"I promise. You are absolutely beautiful."

I took a deep breath in and my cheeks flushed as I closed my eyes and smiled. I rested my cheek onto his comforting hand. He leaned closer to me and pulled me close.

Then he kissed me.