I'm scared of being alone not because the feeling of being alone but because when I am alone all I can do is think and remember. Remember all the pain I went thru and that I will always be alone my only friend the sharp little blade I carve in to my self just to help me feel that I have some kind of control over the pain. You won't believe have many times I put a gun to my head and and couldn't pull the trigger because I wasn't ready but I feel like the blade is the only thing I can turn to when I can't handle things it makes me feel safe in a weird way well I love y'all but I need sleep bye
