SAYANG

2

I woke up panting and sweating despite having the air conditioner on 16 degrees. Napaniginipan ko nanaman yung tagpong pilit kong kinakalimutan for almost 5 years now. I looked at my bedside clock and saw that it was 3am, May 26th. No wonder. This marks the 5th anniversary of that dreadful day, and all I plan to do is work. I tried to move on, in fact I did move on. However, I tend to really dream of that same scenario as if I was reliving the past, I have this feeling that I am missing something to be able to totally leave it all behind.

And since I think that I won't be able to sleep any more, I got up and went to my study table and start reading my notes for the hearings that I am scheduled to attend this day.

Before starting, I pondered upon myself as to where I am now... It has been 4 years since I passed the bar exams, and started working as a Public Attorney, everything is still new to me. I never planned on working with the government, heck, I did not plan on taking up law in the first place. Having been born in a family of doctors, it was as if an unwritten rule that I become a doctor myself. But just as every family, there will always be a black sheep, and I am that one in our family.

There are unforeseen events in our lives that tend to shaken up things and redirect our paths.

A  graduate of a medically inclined course and having passed the board exams, I was set to take the NMAT exams, which I did... however, the results are not what I expected it to be. My percentile not reaching the cut off for my dream school, I rebelled against myself and my family, and secretly took entrance exams of 2 law schools. I asked for a sign that if ever I passed the entrance exam, I will pursue law school. Whether my family likes it or not. Plus, 2 of my elder siblings are already doctors and are making a name for themselves in their chosen specialized fields; my younger sibling is eager to take up medicine himself. So, when the results came out and I learned that I passed the entrance exams, and was scheduled for an interview to both schools, I took it as the sign I was asking, that maybe, I am destined for a different career path than most of my family. I was luckily a candidate for enrolment to both schools; both were amazing schools and produces bar topnotchers in every bar exam, that was when the dilemma started. Being naturally close to my father than my mother, and knowing that sooner or later I need to tell them... I asked for my father's advise.

"Pa?"
"Yes, anak?"
"Can I talk to you?", Papa put his folder down and motioned me to come near him.
"Sure. What's the matter?"
"You see... I know I disappointed you all for not being able to enroll to med school."
"Anak, we told you that it's alright. You can try again next year."
"That's the problem po, Papa. I... uhm..." I felt that my heart was about to explode, if not I was sure that my Trop- I was slightly elevated. I was shivering, and I was not able to look Papa in the eyes. He took my chin up, looked me in the eyes and said,
"You can tell me what it is, Miks. I am and will always be proud of you. Of what your decision would be. You never let us down. And I know you never will. " I started to cry but it gave me a boost to tell him directly.
"I took entrance exams to 2 law schools...."
"Law school?"
"Yes, Papa. I was weighing it even before, if you can remember. When I was enrolling for college, I did not know what course to take. Sabi ko, if I take up accountancy, I'll be a CPA tend take up. Or Med Tech and be a doctor like Mama and you, Kuya and Ate. I really tried Pa, I wanted to become a doctor, specially during my intership days when I envy those who wear white lab coats."
"Oo, sinabi mo yan dati. Kaya I supported you. Sabi ko, I will support you whatever your decision is. At hanggang ngayon, I stand by with what I said. " sabi ni Papa habang hinahawakan ang ulo ko at sinusuklay suklay kunwari ang buhok ko, just like when I was a kid.
"Opo. And Papa, I got accepted dun sa mga schools. Ateneo and Beda. However, I am torn. I want to ask for advise."  Papa looked excited and genuinely happy.
"Wow, anak. That's Ateneo and Beda, 2 leading law schools in the country. I am proud. Super proud. ",
"Thank you, Papa. But I'd like to ask. Which do you think is better. Ateneo offers the JD program, while Beda offers LLB."
"Anak, ayoko maging biased but you know naman na Atenista ako. Hahahaha" , it was a successful attempt for my father to make me laugh. "I believe JD program is a better choice. But it is still up to you, anak. Have you told Mama about this already?", "Then, I guess you ought to tell her. Pero alam ko masaya din naman sya sa decisions mo. Pero tatanungin ka non, bat di mo tinry sa UST, anak? Alam mo naman ang Mama mo, produkto ng UST yun. Sabihin pa nun ako favorite mo."
After that, we were called for dinner and that was when I told the whole family of my decision. And papa was right, Mama did ask why I did not consider UST.

I was put back in reverie by the alarm coming from my phone, and when I looked at it, it was already 5. Grabe! 2 hours yung pag rereminisce ko. Pero looking back, I am so happy that I was blessed to be born sa family ko. I will never trade them for anything. Ang akala ko pagagalitan nila ako dahil sa impulsive decision ko dati to take up law but they were 100% full support from day one up to the day I signed the Roll of Attorneys up to now. I was about to head to my comfort room when my phone rang, it was only 5:15 am. I looked at the caller ID and saw that it was my older sister, I answered right away.

"Miks?" She was crying.
"Yes, Achi? What's the matter?"
"Miks, si Papa." I felt my heart stop beating.
"What happened, Ate?" She was silent for a moment, panting, narinig kong tinatawag siya sa likod na parang megaphone, she must be in the hospital as of the moment. Lalo akong kinabahan.
"Ate, anong nangyari?"  I asked her again.
"Just come to the hospital. Please." Then the line went off. I hurriedly went to the CR to take a bath and prepared myself to drive to St. Lukes.