A slow slam of a door closing was my alarm for this bright day. I sprung up to notice Trace lying beside me. His strong arms were wrapped around my fragile waste. I turned towards him and ran my fingertips through his dark, long hair to see if that will wake him. As he began to toss and turn, I slowly rose from the bed. I walk out of the room and made my way towards the balcony. Before I could quite make it to the door he quickly swept me off my feet, spun me around and kissed my lips tenderly. He then threw me down on the couch, sat down beside me and whispered, “Go get ready I want to take you somewhere special.”
I then made my way to the pamper room, and started swiftly doing my hair and getting changed. By the time I was done, he was nowhere in sight. I then started searching the whole house for him. After many failed attempts to find him. I was then alerted by the sound of my name being called, “Rose, Rose!” I sprinted for the balcony door, and swung it open to find Trace down on the pavement holding dark red roses and standing beside an old fashioned bike. After I met him outside, we made our way to “somewhere special.”
Trace then ushered me down a wooden path that lead to the coastline. We strolled down the long seashore for about a mile sharing laughs, till finally Trace stared gently removing my cover up. He then flung it to the sand, grabbed my arm and started leading me into the water. We floated on our backs and shared pointless stories about our past memories. Also how we would both love to spend the rest of our futures together. We stayed in the ocean till we couldn’t stand the puniness of our fingertips anymore.
He warmed me better than any blanket could. He also was the only one that can lift my spirit so high off the lonely ground. At the time he was my everything; I build my life around a human being, who had a very easy advantage of breaking my heart. But I could care less, I found love and that to me was too valuable to let go.
As daylight was no longer in sight, we started to make our way back to the house. Trace ran his fingers back and forth along my hand, and then suddenly realized that the promise ring he got me was no longer on my finger. Before I got the chance to freak out Trace assured me that he would find it. “Stay here I’ll be right back.” He said as he turned and ran in the other direction.
After a long while of waiting for Trace, I decided to go look for him. I walked down many roads till something caught my eye. The reflection of what seemed to be lights from an ambulance shining off a window into my eyes; I then quickly walked to go see what all of the commotion was about. I walked up to what seemed to be a scene of a car accident. My stomach started to turn when I noticed the kid lying in the street had dark, long hair and a face I could recognize anywhere. It was Trace.
My heart slowly busted into pieces. Suddenly everything around me started to slow down, my vision, all the words that have been said. It just didn’t seem real. I pushed through the crowd and made my way to see Trace. As they lifted him in the ambulance, I jumped in right behind him. Trace could barely open his eyes. I held his hand along the way to the hospital with no reaction in return.
As we arrived, a doctor escorted me to the waiting room, and told me he will let me know when I can see Trace. I waited for many hours, and through many times of the doctor suggesting me to go home, he said multiple times that I couldn’t see him tonight. But I could care less; nothing could make me leave Traces side, even if we were a couple rooms apart.
I couldn’t sleep, I sat there worrying and thinking about the worst possible outcomes. Till finally the doctor came out, and gave a hand gesture letting me know to follow him. We walked past many silent rooms till we reached the one where Trace laid, covered in blankets with bloody gauze wrapped around his aching head. He was barley asleep. It was so hard to see someone you love in so much pain. I tried holding in my tears for Trace. I held his hand, and felt his gentle grip in return. He slowly looked up at me and smiled. For some reason, that smile was the only thing I needed at the moment. That smile assured me that things will be alright.
Recovery was hard for Trace. He basically had to learn how to walk all over again, but we took it day by day and I was there to help him through it. The six months we had been together before the accident couldn’t have made us as close as we were now because of the accident. Trace started getting better. The new and recovered Trace was unrecognizable. Then a couple months passed and things made a turn for the worse.
Anger turned into rage, laughs turned into tears, play fighting turned into actually fights, and love turned into hate. I tried everything I could to get the old Trace back, our relationship back. I forgave him many times when he didn’t deserve to be forgiven and put up with so much. I stayed wishing the old him would return. I ended up waiting a year.
Tonight I walk down this dark road holding a broken ones hand with a huge hole in my heart. I’m still broken, Trace was my first love, and know he’s gone. Legitimately gone, he changed into a new person. All I could do is learn to except it and try my best to move forward with my life. We walk down this road of silence, holding each other’s shaky palms, both being cautious of each step we take.
A light started to emerge at the end of the road, it’s bright and brilliant. A strange shadow began to form in this brightness. A figure I could recognize anywhere. It was Trace, I felt his presence. A feeling I haven’t felt in a while, not since that smile he shot me as he laid in the hospital bed. Ever since then, it’s like that presence has slowly faded and a dark presence replaced it. It was almost like he died in that accident. But surely everything I loved did.
This feeling was so refreshing, I felt as if a new light has hit me. This feeling was my closure, a thing that was surely needed.
