Querencia (n.)
A place from which one's strength is drawn, where one feels at home;
Where you are your most authentic self.
The tears are coming but I don't want you to know, so I play along. I feign smiles, exchange laughter and frown whenever you look away. My inner thief isn't as stealthy as she used to be and you've caught me. A sudden surge of panic rises up my chest. What if you think I'm stupid and weak? I bite my lower lip and with all the strength I can muster, I try to not let my dams break and let the water flow. All my fears wash away as you gently pull me to you, caress my face and stroke my hair as I lay on your arm. I close my eyes but it becomes impossible to stop them from leaking this time. I feel so safe, so sound, like a little sunflower, whose owner's striving to protect it with all their might. I can feel little zests of energy wherever my body makes contact with yours. I bawl into your arms, without any fear of rejection, of being hit and left alone, of anything at all. And I know, the minute your voice, merely honey being melted into my ears, starts sounding, that you're my querencia, my home. And you always will be. I love you, Farwa.
