Famous: A Deadly Love Story

First Love

Doctor: Zar Ali Khan, an artist, a singer, a murderer and a depressor. You have been charged for killing a girl named Katy and also for making a depressing song which pulls people to suicide. Looking at your behavior the court sent you here for your mental checkup. For record I need to ask you. Do you feel that you are mentally unfit?

Zar: My lovers are dead, my haters are alive. People want to kill me because I killed their loved ones. Sometimes, we know that the thing we are doing is wrong. We even try to stop ourselves but our mind doesn't allow us. It remains stubborn. Why? I don't know. Might be because our mind sees a great plus point for ourselves in that act. I... killed, sang, lived and loved with just one intention. The intention to be famous. This is where I brought myself. My haters are alive. My lovers are dead. Only because I wanted to be famous.

Doctor: Are you okay?

Zar: I am fine doctor! Physically as well as mentally. Completely conscious and obviously famous.

Doctor: You have a poetic style of speaking. Speak to me more about it.

Zar: I learned writting poems from her. By writting poems on her. Only one of which she saw.

Doctor: Who Katy?

Zar: No doctor(gives a smile). She was different, special and amazing. Her name was Samin. The unique name on the unique person. Funny isn't it?

Doctor: Mind to tell me the story?

Zar: It all happened so fast that I can tell you even the minutes of it. From the time I first saw her to the time we met last. I loved her without worrying that she loved me or not.

I was in 6th standard when she joined my school. The first time I saw her it was a yes! This is it! I declared she is my girl. Teachers introduced her to the class and I got to know her name. Starting days of her new school she was quite, adjusting herself in the new environment. I took each and every chance to get close to her. Days passed. We went in higher grades. She got more prettier, brave and intelligent! I still remember I realized that I had turned myself into detective Conan! I started stalking her. I found out her address. I tried to convince my parents to make me to join those tuitions where she used to go. But no luck! In 9th grade I heard she joined tennis. Of course I too joined! I was afraid to talk to her. What if I tell her my feelings for her and she rejects!
Whenever I used to come in front of her I used to fumble. Oh God! I should not, I knew that! But seeing her right in front my eyes used to make me speechless and my mind used to forget to instruct my mouth instead instructed my eyes to keep looking at her.

I wrote my first poem thinking about her.

When, I saw you Little butterfly
with long hair swirl
Thought you will be mine
Because You were my dream girl.

That Intoxicating of your eyes
Which Makes me feel alive
Is your lips or some Daisy?
They always drive me crazy

That cutest of your smiles
Just like necklace of pearls
Always feel me alive
Never Makes me dull

Always Felt you are my Princess
And I'm only your only prince
When I was then eleven
And you were ten since

We stepped into 10th grade. The first feeling I had was, will I see Samin after this year? Who knows where she will be where I will be. The day I saw her for the first time she was mine. She was not only my crush but she was my true love.
And the most emotional day arrived. Send off for 10th grade students. I prepared myself that I will not miss this chance and say her everything I have been feeling all these years but my mind had caught phobia! I had brought my first digital camera to capture memories and all, but the main motive was to capture her. On that day,
We finished our lunch. Some students were still having lunch, some were clicking pictures with teachers, I saw her going towards my class. It was the perfect moment I thought I would capture her forever in my camera. And destiny was with me! She was alone in classroom sitting on her regular bench absorbing every moment she has gone through. Observing no one around I adjusted my lenses and clicked her pic. Destiny plays very distinct role in our lives. The moment I clicked her pic, her so called best friend shouted looking at me as she had witnessed the work I did. And here comes the phobia which made me delete Samin's only picture I had!