Low Point in Life- Ryan/Shane

Conversation?

Shane shrugged. He figured, 'why should I stay if I'm just making him miserable?' But, leaving wasn't too good of an idea either, because it seems like Ryan needs him. He kept wanting to ask, 'are you okay?' but he knew the answer was no. His charming snark was fading in and out but he knew that if Ryan found out he was upset that would just make him feel bad. "You know, it's one in the morning. I can wander the streets if you want to sleep for work tomorrow."
"I'm not going into work. They'll understand."
"Still, you need to sleep."
"I just proved to you ghosts are real in the least favourable way possible, I'm exhausted but I don't think I'm too eager to sleep."
"Fair enough, but still. Don't say I didn't warn you when you fall asleep with your head in a bowl of instant ramen."
"Oh please, like I would do that. I'll probably faint first."
"Faint then. It's not like I'm going to slam you up against the wall if you do."
"Like I'm really going to faint on command?"
"No, I'm just saying. You're the only one in this house still anchored to corporeality, doesn't matter to me. This whole ghost crap is bologna."
"You're telling me. I wish you were never dead in the first place."
"You and me both."
"Well, it's an eye-opening experience. Or, should I say, eye-closing."
"Don't start making death humour, or you're gonna be dead out of luck," Shane retorts, grinning.
"What, did I kill the atmosphere?" Shane smiles. Man, it was hard not to let those three words slip out. I love you. "No, I think you're just dying to tell me these stupid jokes." Shane was surprised when Ryan suddenly lit up a bit. They laughed. 'Man, I love you.' Shane was even more surprised when the thought was not his own thought. "I know you're itching to get to the bottom of this. Why don't we get started looking for stuff around the house?"
"If there was any evidence it'd probably be in a box already."

"A box?"
"Yeah, I'm moving. You think I'm really going to continue living here?"
"Well I guess it just didn't occur to me."
"Yeah, the movers are coming at the end of the week."
"Well we better start looking then, huh?" Ryan shrugs. "Sure. Now, was it a physical entity or-"

"It wasn't a ghost, idiot, stop tripping yourself out. Your house isn't haunted."
"Well, now it is." Shane looks confused before grinning. "Right. Sorry about that."
"No worries. I do have a question about that though. Other than the fact that you- you know- here, why wouldn't you materialise over at Sara's?" Shane thought for a moment to avoid saying anything more-than-friendly. "I don't know, I guess it's probably because you're my best friend and I guess my dead subconscious thought you would be rubbing it in my face that ghosts are real instead of freaking out. I was, apparently, off in my assumption."
"Yeah, no shit. So why don't you go over to Sara's now?" Shane shrugs. "I want to try and solve my murder first. If it is admitting my love," Shane eyes Ryan but Ryan pays no mind, "then I want to give them closure."
"Fair enough. But why'd you say 'them?' I know it's Sara." Shane tries to come up with a logical explanation but before he could Ryan was already jumping to conclusions.
"Is it not Sara?"
"Well, yes and no. It's definitely Sara, but it's not-"
"Is it Keith? Is that why you couldn't tell 'them,' because he's engaged?" Shane was about to say 'no, ew, why on Earth' but he couldn't really come up with a better explanation that was still convincing. Plus, it was like they were having a semi-normal conversation now, and Ryan had taken his mind off his stress for a moment. "Sure," Shane says rather blandly.
"Ooh, scandalous." Ryan giggles, and that causes Shane to beam. He missed making Ryan laugh, or (wheeze) on occasion. "Yeah, yeah. Did you see anything incriminating?"
"Just a gun the police took." Shane made a face that expressed 'well, duh.' "Did it have any evidence worth looking into on it?"
"There was a smear of blood that had been used to wipe off a fingerprint, but by the time the police got to it there was less than half of it left. Not really something you can run through the system."
"Ugh, if you want we can run down to the police station and try to look at the evidence they did find." Ryan shakes his head. "I'm kind of a prime suspect. It happened in my house, I don't think they're too eager to let me look at the evidence." There was a pause. "Sara could help," Shane suggests. "She's been through enough on her own," Ryan says, drooping slightly. "In that case... Come to the police station with me. You can distract them saying you found something while I go into the evidence locker and review what they have."
"And how do you think you're going to know exactly where to look? I'm sure there are quite a few guns there."
"Well, true. But I can hear what you're thinking, right? Why not everyone else?" Ryan furrows his brows. "What do you mean?"
"Take a day off so you don't have a heart attack but then when you go back into work you can bring me up in different conversations and see if there's anything incriminating I can hear."
"It's not like they're going to be able to arrest someone simply on that."
"No, but you can crack them. And if you can't, it'll create closure at the very least." Ryan smiles. "Sure, and how am I, the 'broken guy,' as they call me, going to break someone into admitting to killing my best friend?"
"We have time. On your 'sick' day, that's what we can figure out." Shane watched how Ryan drooped even further, and he didn't have to read his thoughts to be able to figure out he was thinking about what would happen after they caught the murderer. He would potentially be alone again, forced to come back to the place where Shane was murdered every day until he moved out without anyone but the movers to help. He didn't know who he was going to replace- oh how he hated that word- Shane with on the show, and no matter how many episodes he did with the new person it wouldn't fill the Shane-sized hole in his life. Fans would begin suspecting, because unlike when Brent was replaced, Shane wouldn't show up anywhere else. Then the sympathy would come in in waves, but it wouldn't make anything better.

He'd once again be dealing with Shane's death without Shane.

It sounded like something that was quite trivial, but ever since about an hour ago it seemed like he wasn't dealing with everything alone. Dozens of people were there to support him but he still felt alone.

"Uh, anyways, do you want to go back to sleep?" Shane asks, cocking his head just a bit. Ryan smiles sadly. "I already told you the answer."
"I don't see what else you're going to do at 3 in the morning with a ghost in your house."
"You're probably right, but most likely I'll just be scrolling through Instagram. It's not like I was exactly well-rested before, either. I just- I guess I just want to talk to you."
"I'm sure you're shocked to hear that even as a ghost I don't have unlimited talking points."
"That's not what I meant. It's more just, being present in a room with you, rather than talking points. As lonely as this otherwise empty house gets I don't really have to talk."
"Look, I get it, but if you want to be less lonely I'm not much help. Get a date, go to the bar, whatever."
"I don't want to hang out with a random person. If someone who could potentially be a figment of my imagination that's slowly driving me insane is the closest thing I'm getting to my dead best friend then I'm staying in this very spot."
"When did you get so mopey all of a sudden? Even when you were scared shitless that we were both gonna die you weren't so clingy." Ryan simply glared at him, looking pitiful as ever, which shut Shane up right on the spot. Shane used all his concentration to not let an extra three words and eight letters out.
He knew what was going to happen when he said it.
He'd be leaving Ryan again, and that wasn't something to be determined. He knew that "solve your murder" thing was a load of crap, but since he wasn't actually alive anymore he just wanted to give Ryan closure.

He loved Ryan, sure, but if being able to stay with him meant not being able to express it then he would do it for eons.