the sixth of march

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my God,

i feel really intimidated, praying my thoughts.  when i picture a visual image of you, i think of dark storm clouds and flashes of lightning.  you feel dangerous to me, and i feel so small.  i feel afraid of you, which i suppose is healthy.  but i just feel so unworthy.

which i am.

i was talking to rachael about this yesterday, that i think of you different than Jesus.  Jesus seems quiet and kind and gentle, but you, God, seem powerful and infinite and intense.  isn't that weird?  you are the lion and Jesus is the lamb.  there's so much i don't know about you.

who am i to pray to you?

why do i feel so afraid of you today?  i don't know.  

my Lord, will you teach me something today from your word?  --

sorry i had to leave just now.  jack said andrew ripp and -- 

nevermind.

are you angry with me?  i've never felt this way before.  

i feel afraid.

amen.

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