Lemme Shoot My Shot

C//1

My name is Alexis and living in New York is one of my personality traits. New York represents me...from the music to the aesthetic to the hard accent. I am New York. One of the biggest blessings of New York are the women. Some women you forget off the streets and some women make their mark unforgettable.

Anybody can sit here and lie as if they'd never met a woman that put them in that predicament. I can assure you that I am not one of those people that can lie and say that because I have met a woman who's mark is unforgettable. Her name is India or what I know her as which is (The Most Beautiful Girl In The City).

" Alexis I see your sexy ass drooling over this" India walks over to me and smiles "What makes you think I'm drooling?" I walk closer to India and grab her by the waist. It gets very quiet all of a sudden and I start to whisper in her ear "Why we gotta act like this? Let's just skip a couple steps" we look in each other's eyes and get lost for a minute. "Alexis baby you know why—"

"India; mamas, I just wanna make you happy that's all...I love spending time with you and I know you like spending time with me...I feel like I know the vibes lowkey but it's cool" she let's go of me and has a concerned look on her face "What you tryna say? What's the vibes?" before I could respond to her the phone goes off.

"Jaws...what are you even talking abou-you know what–" India looks up from her phone and walks slowly at the front door. "India what are you doing?" I try to catch up to her and she walks out the door and turns towards me "I'll see you tomorrow Alexis, okay? I want to see you tomorrow and I'll talk to you for real I swear" India walks away and leaves me breathless.

It was her–she was my mark, she was the one who made my heart beat a million times but also made tears fall out my eyes. I can't believe one person one female could make me do many things I didn't want to do. I couldn't be friends with her and I knew it she knew it and so did everybody else.

When I got home I noticed I had a couple text messages in my phone nothing big, or so I thought as all of them..most of them were from India.

(India Fine Ass😍💫) : I'm sorry I left you hanging like that 🙃
(India Fine Ass😍💫): Baby I miss you 🥺
(India Fine Ass 😍💫): smh aii

It was text messages like these that made me confused like how could a girl text someone like this and not have feelings, it's impossible. I never understood why she was so concerned about why I wouldn't text her back a certain time if we aren't together.

Me: Wassup Gangsta 😬
(India Fine Ass😍💫) : Why you texting me all dry and shit? 😐
Me: Why you expecting more than that?
(India Fine Ass😍💫): Stop playin, you know you my lil daddy 😛
Me: Mhm I'm going to sleep mamas gn 🙃
(India Fine Ass😍💫): Stfu 😑 gn

People always ask me why do I keep going back to her and the only answer I have is the bond that we created. They don't understand what we have and that our connection is different. People seem to always shade what they wish they had—we make each other happy and we keeping around what makes us happy and why it makes us happy is our business.

Waking up in the middle of the night is the worst thing ever. The only thing is–being met with a shocking phone call is the craziest thing to wake up to ever. "What you doing up at this time?" I look at the beautiful figure I'm on FaceTime with and yawn. "Alexis you know I be up at night...and I missed you" I smirk and hop out of bed with my phone in my hand.

"Okay gangsta, what you got going on right now?" I walk into the kitchen searching for a late night snack as we talk on FaceTime. "I don't know, I think I'm about to smoke or something" I stop what I'm doing and look down in the camera "Or why don't I pick you up and we can go for a ride—we could smoke and chill and talk and vibe and shi-"

I stop and stare at her–admiring her smile, she was really paying attention to me. "I just really miss you" I could see her smile and some times like this made me question what we are. "I miss you too I just want to talk to you I couldn't go straight to sleep without talking to you, you know how you make me feel" I paused for a second before I asked this next question. "And how do I make you feel, India?" And at that moment there was a longer pause. I could feel my heart beating out my chest.

It was at that moment I could see her hesitation and that told me my answer. "Alexis baby what time are you picking me up?"