A Dream of Solace

23: Maxie

"No, no-"

"Don't." She wiped away a tear from her cheek. "I know it is. I was selfish and all three of us paid for it. When I was unconscious, I had a dream you were drowning and you kept telling me it was your fault. No matter what you think Nathan, none of this is because of anything you did."

"And no matter what you say, Maxie," Nathan returned. "Nothing will convince me that I wasn't at fault. I appreciate what you said but the truth is that I should never have left. I should have stayed and taken care of you."

"So we were both wrong. I'm sorry, Nathan." Maxie inched closer to him. "I promise I will never keep anything from you ever again. Can you forgive me?"

"There's nothing to forgive. I love you Maxie." He released her hands and pulled her close, kissing her gently. "It killed me to think I could have stopped all of this from happening. I'll never walk away from you again. Will you forgive me for walking away?"

"Nathan, don't be stupid. There's nothing to forgive!" She threw herself into his arms, clinging to his neck. "I love you too."

They sat, entwined in each other's arms finding comfort with each other at long last. Maxie rested her cheek against his chest, listening to his heart beat. All of the fear and anger she'd felt for the last couple of months melted away. This was the first time she had connected with Nathan in months and the relief she felt was overwhelming.

"I found your present," Nathan said after a while. She pulled back and looked at him, puzzled. "The frame," he prompted.

She bit her lip uncertainly. "You're not mad?"

"That you bought me a present?" Nathan grinned. "No, not at all. In fact," he added, digging into his pocket. "It made me realize that I never got you a gift."

He pulled out a small velvet box and placed it gently in her hand. She opened it, touching the small gold charm. "For my bracelet. It's my birthstone."

"It's our daughter's birthstone," he corrected gently. "I don't think you know this, but you have the same birthday."

"We do?"

Nathan nodded. "You don't mind, do you?"

"As if I could do anything about it now," Maxie laughed. "Thank you Nathan. This is so thoughtful." She closed the box. "But you're not mad about the frame are you? I mean, I chose a name without you."

"Yes, you did. Don't worry, I like it. And I'm tired of people telling me to name the baby. Speaking of, how would you like to go see her?"

"The baby? Of course I would! Am I allowed?"

"Who cares? Wait here." He disappeared into the hallway and returned a moment later with an orderly pushing a wheelchair. "Ready to sneak out of here?"

Maxie grinned, reaching for her robe. "I don't know what happened to my straight arrow husband, but I kind of like this rule breaker."

Nathan picked her up and settled her into the wheelchair. He thanked the orderly and took over, pushing her to the elevator. They passed Elizabeth and Griffin deep in conversation. Maxie watched as they leaned closer to each other, oblivious to anyone but each other.

"What's going on there?" Maxie whispered.

"None of our business is what's going on," Nathan returned as the elevator doors closed on them. Moments later, they were at the NICU. Nathan stopped the wheelchair outside the room. "Feel up to going in?"

Maxie nodded, letting Nathan lead her into the room where a nurse was finishing changing the baby's diaper. She looked up at them, smiling in recognition. "Detective West. I'm glad you're here. I spoke with Dr. Lee and she agreed."

"Agreed with what?" Maxie asked, transfixed by the baby.

"Dr. Lee thinks the baby is strong enough to be held." He kissed the top of Maxie's head. "Would you like to hold your daughter?"

She nodded, holding her arms out to the nurse who placed the swaddled baby in her arms. Nathan knelt down next to her, looking from Maxie to the baby. "I've been waiting to see this since we found out we were having a baby," he murmured. "You're both so beautiful."

"I look terrible," Maxie replied with an arched eyebrow. "But she's gorgeous." She looked down at the baby with a serene smile. "Yes, you are Nathalie."

"Nathalie Mariah Jones-West. That's a mouthful."

"And Mariah Maximilliana or James Nathan Reeves West Obrecht isn't?"

"In all fairness, only two of those names really count." Nathan smoothed the blanket back away from the baby's face. "You know I'm just going to call her Mariah, don't you?"

Maxie reached out her hand and drew him closer. "Of course we are. Our whole family goes by their middle names."

"That's right," Nathan said wrapping them both in his arms. "Our family."