Blue, Black

1: Josh

It's Saturday. It's a new day. Maybe today things will change. Maybe today i wont go to sleep with a bruised back or a broken arm. Maybe today will be happy. And maybe if i keep telling myself this it will come true.

Anyways. While i keep fooling myself, let me say my say my name is Josh, Josh Dun. I am roughly 17 years old, my father is a drunken abusive asshole, and im bi. I help him as much as i can but he gets worse as every agonizing day passes by.

I cant stress the enough that i suffer from severe depression and major physically abuse. I have no friends, no other family, and no hope.
I dont do well in school, and i have a minimum wage paying job to pay for my dads alcohol and drug addiction. Yes, he has been to rehab. He has been to it too many times to count.

So you know about my life now. Lets get on with the day thats to come. So its Saturday as i said earlier. Its about 7:34 am and im awake standing on the roof of my ramshackle home in the middle of a forrest basically in Columbus, Ohio. Im contemplating wether i should jump or not.  Im not. I know im not bc i do this everyday hoping one day i will jump and set myself free.

Its now 7:36. And i have climbed down the roof and down to the front door of my house. And i walk in and back to my room and lye down like i do everyday. I wait about 30 minutes and stars at the ceiling confiding what to do with my life. Then, i leave and go for a walk in the woods. And i always bring a journal with me to write. It could be poetry, a story, or just whatever allows me to get out what im feeling. I always sit under the same tree to write. The same dying and rotting tree to write the most dark and soulful pieces of my own literature that contain my emotions and deepest thoughts. I open my journal. And start to write a poem.

Look
Look at me
Look at my skin and bones
Practically screaming for help
Falling apart and shattering
Piece by piece
I cant do it
I cant live anymore
Look at me now
Before you lose me forever

I know my poetry sucks ass but i mean it helps through some tough shit.

Anyways. I get back up and start walking and see a figure running. It looks like someone is running towards me. They get closer. It looks like someone is just going for a run so i sit back down and look at some previous writings from yesterday and days before.

The person gets closer and tripped on a tree stump. It looks like they're injured, so i guess im gonna get up and help them up.

I say, "Hey. Are you ok?"

They say, "Um kind of not. Can u help me up?"

I reply, "Yeah, sure. Whats your name?"

He replies, "im Tyler, Tyler Joseph. And you?"

I say, "josh dun"

I help him up.

Tyler says, "ok den. I guess ill be on my way. Thanks man."

I ask, "u ok to walk?"

Tyler replies, "ye. Im fine."

His leg was cut open and he was bleeding intensely.

I say,"look man say what u want but im helpin u home or wherever u need to go."

Tyler replies,"ok, the good thing is my house is only 30 feet away from where we are standing so it shouldnt be that bad of a walk."

I ask,"wait u live at the house by the lake? You must have just moved here."

Tyler replies,"ye my mom and i."

I say,"ok lets get you home."