Sixty-Two ☼ Phan

Five

Phil wasn't at breakfast. I looked.

"Feeling better?" I asked Chris as the three of us walked towards the table we were at earlier that morning. He seemed more awake, at least.

"Sleep," he nodded. "I'd die without it."

The menu today was even less than that of yesterday. And that's saying something, considering yesterday's was nonexistent. I got a cereal cup and a banana, and Peej and Chris both got four pieces of toast. We took a juice box each and sat quietly.

About four minutes into eating, James showed up. He had a bag of chips in one hand.

"Breakfast?" Peej questioned as he sat down across from us.

"I raided the snack cabinet," he whispered, side glancing around a moment, then smiling widely.

Chris snickered, and I choked a little. James opened his bag and began to eat. Peej just shook his head, although a faint smile lingered. There was something about him that we all seemed to appreciate silently.

James was one of those guys that looked like he belonged in his parent's basement. He had wild curly hair, red, unlike mine, tangled into knots but still visibly appealing. His eyes were a dark brown, and the hoodie he was wearing over the counselor uniform was baggy around his skinny frame. Shoes and jeans probably older than me. And the center of it all, his tattoo. It stuck out like a beacon to me.

"So, what are we doing today?" I asked him.

He looked at me for a second, then back down into the bag. He gave it a little shake, rustling what remained of the chips and making all the salt at the bottom of the bag clatter.

"Whatever you guys want."

Chris smiled brightly, obviously excited at the prospect of the day being in his hands.

Peej nudged him. "You guys, as in not just you."

He made a face, shoving a whole piece of toast into his mouth. His eyes still glinted with thought, despite it.

"Why don't we go into the forest?" I suggested.

The three of them looked at me. Then, Peej and Chris turned to James, who took a moment before noticing. The pressure of his authority shone in the dark circles around his eyes, and he pressed his lips into a sideways purse.

"Yeah, sure." He tipped his head backwards, emptying the crumbs into his mouth. "Why not?"

"Let's go when we finish eating, then," Peej said.

I nodded, as well as the others. Then, before I could stop it, a thought climbed up my throat.

"Wait. What about Phil?"

They shared glances.

"If you can get him to come, then I encourage it," James shrugged. "If not, not much loss."

"Agreed."

I felt a strange twinge of spite, though I didn't quite understand it. The urge to stick up for Phil. Why did everybody dislike him so much? And why were they all so difficult about it? Little mumbles and looks that said all sorts of secrets. No words.

At the same time, I was almost afraid to ask. I knew they would tell me, that wasn't the problem. The problem was that I didn't really want to know. Whatever the huge secret about him was, it had this disease of distate that followed, and I didn't want to catch it. I didn't want to not like Phil.