My Psychotic Ex-Boyfriend

Chapter Eleven

The tears fell freely down her cheeks now, ‘J-Just before the cops s-shot him, he said “how dare you h-hurt me, I loved you with all I had and then you-” but then he got s-shot. He wasn’t going to say ‘and then you broke up with me’ he was going to say ‘you cheated on me’ wasn’t he?’

Parker and Benjamin nodded sadly.

When Rosalie spoke next, it had been a few moments and she had managed to gather some of that anger back, but Parker could see through it to the sadness and hurt she was feeling.

‘I have been blaming myself all this time! All this time! And you two didn’t think to even mention this to me!?’

Both Parker and Benjamin opened their mouths to speak but Rosalie put her hand up.

‘I-I need a moment’

Parker watched as Rosalie left the room, going in behind the kitchen where he couldn’t see. Parker placed a hand on Benjamin’s arm as Benjamin stared at the wall guiltily.

‘She shouldn’t have found out like that, overhearing us.’ Benjamin said, his eyes not leaving the wall.

‘I agree, but it’s done now, we’ he took a deep breath, ‘we are just going to have to do what we can to make sure that she’s aright’

Benjamin nodded before turning his sad eyes to Parker, ‘She will never trust me again’

Parker didn’t know what to say, knowing full well that nothing he could say to Benjamin would reassure him enough, so instead he tightened his grip on his friends arm before letting go, turning his eyes to the ground. 

After a few agonising minutes, Rosalie finally returned. When she spoke she wasn’t angry or overly upset, she had a calmness to her that was reassuring that she didn’t hate the boys as much as Parker assumed she would.

‘Why didn’t you guys just talk to me?’ she asked, ‘I would have been angry but I don’t blame you for their deaths’

‘You don’t?’ Benjamin asked shyly.

Rosalie’s eyes turned to him in an instant, ‘What you guys did, it was wrong, on so many levels, but if you two weren’t the ones to set him off then something else would have. I-I knew that something was off with him, but I didn’t do anything about it. I don’t want you guys feeling guilty’

‘But you blame yourself Rose, how can we not blame ourselves too?’ Benjamin asked sadly.

She looked down at her feet.

Benjamin’s question and what Rosalie had been saying caused something to click in Parker’s mind.

‘We made mistakes, all of us, and yes our actions didn’t help, but Chris, he’s the one doing all these awful things. Not us. We can’t keep carrying around all this guilt, it’s destroying us. I know that it’s destroying me’