What’s there to lose?
Everything.
No.
Yes.
I ask my self
Was It right to do that?
I don’t know.
I ask myself again and again…
Was it?
Was it right to do that?
I come up weeping.
Weep. Tears. Cry. Sob. Moan.
What are these words?
I ask myself.
Again and again.
Was it right to do that?
I scream.
Scream. Shout. Screech. Shriek. Shrill.
What are these words?
I ask myself.
Again and again.
No one will listen to me.
Why must it be me?
There’s so many people. Too much. I tell myself.
Got to get away. Got to get away.
My hand moves up. Move. It says.
Move.
Everything seems so blurry.
White.
I see white.
People.
Who are they?
It’s so cold.
My hands feel numb.
The world seems to be moving.
Everything’s moving.
Too fast.
I stand. Too fast.
Too heavy. My brain tells me.
Too heavy.
What’s too heavy? I ask Myself.
‘Your heart’. It whispers.
Tears Flow down. Again. The pain returns. Pain.
Hurt. Torment. Pain. Agony.
It comes to me. Like a ton of bricks.
Just like he would say.
Him.
He would say that. Him
It would fall upon me.
Him
But I didn’t think it would end like this.
No.
Not like this.
No. Not with him walking off.
Not with me seeing his back.
Him.
It wasn’t supposed to be like this.
It was supposed to be our wedding day.
Not with that sound
No.
Crack.
Fall.
Break.
Bit. By. Bit.
Quietly.
In the depth of the night. Where no one would hear. Besides myself.
That sound.
The sound of My Heart.
Breaking.
With the tears flowing.
No it wasn’t meant to end like this.
‘No’ I whisper to myself before falling.
Him.
