random feelings

random text / thought 1

I see you there, hand in hand with whom else, I'm internally on the ground.
I could burst into tears as always when I see you, and the thought you have found someone who makes you happy and that person is not me, destroys me only more and more, day by day.
I wish I could make you laugh, love and miss; I wish I was the reason that you're happy.
I regret what I have done and I wish that I would be that person with whom you are currently happily together; I would do anything for you, risk and danger, but it's not enough for you.
I feel ignored, left alone and just unintentionally. My heart, with so many holes, is not interested by anyone; Devastated, useless.
So love-sick for you, I long for you and I miss you, but you don't even know anymore who I've been; For you, I was just one of many. Dear God, please tell me, have I deserved this?