Snippet

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as a crappy new years resolution, this  2018, i thought it would be a good idea to compile my, sometimes batshit crazy life into just a couple of paragrpahs, or 20.

As you know, school started early August for me, so there are some developments and facts that gotta be transferred over to this year

The main one being:

I suck at boys. 

I'm so bad with boys that its probably the only redeeming quality about me to anyone girl that wants to be my friend and gets friend jealous easily. Like I can only deal with guys that I know I wont develops any romantic feelings for. So actually that worked fine with me in 9th grade because everyone was such a dork

but holy shet. 

I'm in 11th grade now, and one of my friends that I had rejected on multiple occasions, (lets call him Danny) had a huge glow up, and I actually was scared for my heart. I couldnt function for a minute there. But he's ignoring me, I guess to get over the crush he had on me back in 9th and 10th grade. Which is okay.

Not.

however he's not even the worst one. 

Last year, this foreign exchange student (lets call him Robin)  appeared outta literally nowhere. and I got his snapchat and had a streak with him and i actually did speak to him. HOWEVER. One day he ended having the same lunch as me, according to my friend, so we were tryna find him to maybe conversate or somethin. but we couldnt find his ass, which was confusin bc my school is full of white people.

AND IM LOOKING FOR A (not white) BOY WITH BLACK HAIR AND IS THE COLOR OF THE DAMN GODS OKAY. HES REALLY ATTRACTVE.

so attracitve in fact, that one of my strictly guy friends saw him in the hallways and just went "wow he DOES look good. i wanna look like that"

Anyways, I checked my snapchat to see what he was wearing because I thought it would be easy to find him. So I was like shouting his  description and outfit around the table bc come on.

its lunch. its loud as hell

and  before I was even finished describing him, my friend directly in front of my just stops listening, and her mouth is wide open, and I'm still going on cause I thought she just saw something weird. But at some point she got me to stop talking because too my damn luck:

ROBIN WAS RIGHT BEHIND ME. DIRECTLY BEHIND ME. 

MEANING THAT IF I HAD LEANED BACK A LITTLE, AND BUMPED INTO HIM, I WOULDVE AT LEAST NOTICED THAT IT WAS HIM.

i was s h o o k

I thought about crying. but I was like oh nonono I'm not no bitch. 

So I did the second best option. 

I got up very calmly, threw away my food,and fucking blasted to another group of my friends on the other side of the cafeteria. 

Apparently, I got up at a good time too, because like 5 mins after I left, he turned around and looked directly at the seat I had been sitting in and wow i dodged a bullet

Yeah, he was probably the worst one.

Now onto the tragic idiot I know now:

a fuckboiiiiii

He's also a foreigner. Ok there are a lotta diverse people and foreigners even tho I live in the south and white people still manage to make up a huge pop. of my school.

But he (lets call him Harry) also appeared like a damn magic trick. and he flirts.....with just about anyone, i think?

but somehow I ended up getting his snapchat. y'all it always starts with the snapchats okay. ALWAYS. NEVER OVER TEXT. IF ITS ON TEXT THEN ITS SERIOUS OK

anwyas, so I got his snapchat, and it was pretty silent for a while, but I had only really added him to scope out the type of person he was, because like he was snap chatting my other friend, who's a guy.... and who is gay. and then all of a sudden Harry stopped snap chatting him. So I was like haaaa what happened HEEREEE?? 

but then he started snap chatting me a lot. And I mean like 24/7. 

But i was like ok or whateva,and he would send me his stupid ass shirtless pics, as if to scream "hello I do the fucc, pls pay attention to me"

But like honey, Ive been doing classical ballet and my favorite pastime is staring and very well shaped men in tight clothing. because...... its there right in front of me. I'm paying to watch the men not actually dance or anything.

anywyas, I'm not really affected by his little pictures or anything, HOWEVER, I do get scared whenever he takes pics of his sweatpants... like from the most intimate and probably weirdest angle I've ever seen. Like i even tried to recreate the way he does it, and its so damn hard. So i know its intentional. Ik i sound  weird for trying to recreate a fuckboy pose but i was curious okayyy

NOW IM NO PERVERT

BECAUSE THE FIRST TIME I GOT ONE OF THESE PICS I SCREAMED AND DIDNT TALK TO HIM FOR A WHILE ON SNAPCHATTED HIM. Because I was in 10th grade and i don't go around looking at the outlines of people's pee pees. 

But like I realized that yet again, I dance, and all you see is the outline of guys pee pees like thats just what it is, i can't let the puritan ways of america affect me ya know? now this thinking is probabaly bad tho because like I know i can't just be o k a y with everything I see

Anyways this went on for a while, and then summer hit, and I completely dropped off the earth, because I went to Pennsylvania for a ballet program for like 5 weeks, and my phone like gave up on me and parents had to ship me a new one.

But i then came back to school and he started snapchattign me again, and here we are again, and I mean iM not that interested in him as I used to be because I really don't know his intentions neither do I want to know. HOWEVER, I would love to know why he, 

A VERY SPICY BOY

is out here rejecting all these girls that try to...you know, date him. He's waiting for something, or better yet someone, and by the end of the school year, my ass will find out who or whats holding him back.

Also it was his birthday a few weeks ago, and I wished him a happy birthday, and I was thinking in my head hahaha wow that kinda sucks: Im older than him. BUT I COME TO FIND OUT HE TURNED 18. In the 11th grade. When i realized that, I felt like that meme of that woman with he blonde hair who has  equations floating around her head and the x-files theme song playing in the backgorund

Now I'm not calling him an idiot, because he immigrated from central America okay, so like sometimes my school pulls kids back when they don't meet specific requirements, which I believe is english.... like your regular old english class. 

Ya I'm sure he didnt have actual grammar classes for english because he was speaking spanish more than englsih, but this is all my assumptions. Im not saying thats why he got held back. But I do know he does take honors classes so he's not stupid and he's doing his best. which is a plus bc my mom doesn't like me bringing home stupid boys.

Anyways This entire time that Ive known of his existence, HIS ASS WAS A WHOLE YEAR OLDER THAN ME. So i was like thats a plus, but like no. he's untouchable, and I believe I'm about to lose my streak with him for the new years, even though we're almost at 100 days. But whateva. I was gonna ask him to ice-skate, but like I wanna do things but like my head is telling me he's a big old no for me. 

Now two out of three of those guys, Im sure will be a reaccuring characters in my life, because they're the ones really spicing it up for me over my winter break,  which ends in two days (killme) so thats it until someone does something batshit crazy and i have to give you their backstory.

bye bishes